Tepid Coffee and Stale Muffins

Worst. Service. EVER.

2009-08-01T16:38:00.000-07:00

Last night we went to a local restaurant for some dinner to celebrate my wife's birthday. We had some drinks, laughs, and some great food, but our server really sucked. We called in a reservation and were seated immediately upon arriving, and our drink orders were taken promptly. We ordered some appetizers and that's about when he apparently checked out. Besides waiting forever to take our actual entree order and never getting our waters refilled (which is a huge pet peeve of mine), we had to wait about 25 minutes to pay our bill (which was incorrect and had to be adjusted). At a point it almost became comical until we realized we missed the showtime for just about every movie playing nearby. As bad as that was, it reminded me of a recent experience that, to this day takes the cake on bad service.

On our way up to Yosemite to hike Half Dome, we decided to stop and grab some calorie infused breakfast at McDonalds in Oakhurst. We arrived there a few minutes before they opened and patiently waited in the car. After about 15 minutes a gentleman employed by the restaurant approached the door (after finishing his cigarette) and proceeded to bang on it until the person who was 15 feet away came to the door and unlocked it for him. I say "him", because even though it was now 5 minutes past opening time, we continued to wait. 10 minutes later the doors open and we get in. My friend was feeling like a burger and asked if they were serving lunch, the "jovial" doorbanger replied with a monotone "it's morning... we serve breakfast in the morning" while, without looking back extended his index finger toward the wall behind him. My friend pointed back in the same direction at the menus on the wall explaining that the lunch selections were up. My friend then began to give his breakfast choice, and mid-sentence the guy walks away and starts changing the sign to the "appropriate" meal. At this point we would have just left, but seeing as we had eight to nine hours of hiking ahead of us, knew we had to eat something and this was the last place on the way. After the grueling process of the three of us ordering we had to wait an additional ten minutes for our "fast food" all the while hearing about parties the employees attended, guys/girls they wanted to hook up with, and how much they all hated their jobs (comforting? no.).
After getting our food (and checking for spit), we noticed a sign posted by the soda fountain that made us laugh. It read:

PLEASE NO LOITERING.
Time limit 20 minutes
while consuming food

Here's an idea: SERVE the food in under 20 minutes and we'll get out of there lickity split! Honestly... a time limit? Aaaaaaaand... this is another reason why I try to avoid McDonalds.

Finally made it to the top!

2009-07-29T13:09:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago myself and two friends took to the mountain and hiked half dome in Yosemite. It's something I've wanted to do for a little while, but had heard from several people that it's a tough trip and was a little worried about being able to make it. So to prepare, I skipped dinner the night before and got a full 3 hours of sleep (insert sarcastic tone here). People weren't lying, it is quite a hike 18 miles round trip, 4000 foot vertical, and the infamous cables up the side of the dome at the end. Once at the top, the amazing view of Yosemite Valley was all at once trumped by the realization we had to go back down the cables and hike another four hours in the hundred degree heat. The whole way we were huffing, puffing, and grumbling; but in the end (and after a full days rest) we looked back and really felt like we accomplished something (although we all pretty much agreed never to do it again).

Bonus: This is what I saw when I took my shoes off after the hike, LOL.

How to make someone appreciate a desk job

2009-07-29T13:00:00.000-07:00

I really don't like it when people complain about the weather.
It's just something that:

Everyone you're talking to is experiencing as well
There's nothing you can do about it

That being said, it's been a little slow work wise this week. And because of that, I got the opportunity to go out in the field instead of being stuck at my desk all day.

Monday morning around 8:30 I was asked to visit a site in Selma and take some photos for a project we're working on. I spent about two hours walking up and down the streets taking some photos and then on the way back grabbed an iced drink from Starbucks. It was quite nice and made the day fly by when I got back. So yesterday, when I was asked to go out to another site to take some measurements, I was more than willing to go. I jumped in the work truck and started to drive and it was at that point I started to doubt the "fun" of this trip. I looked at the rear view mirror and saw this:

Yeah... having even your eyeballs sweat kinda puts a damper on the novelty of being out in the field. Needless to say, it was nice to get back to the office that day.

I sold my soul to Gamestop

2009-07-29T12:39:00.000-07:00

Times being what they are right now and with a load of fun things quickly coming up on the horizon; I decided to make some quick cash by trading in some old Gamecube games that have sat in my closet untouched for a couple of years now. I packed up my stuff in what turned out to be a unwieldy stack of Jenga pieces and headed over to Gamestop.

I decided to go a little out of my way in order to go to a less busy store with close parking. I got out of my car, grabbed the stack of games (which only fell over 18 times on the way there) and headed for the door. As I approached the store I could see one of the store employees shaking his head (that's never a good sign). I pulled an amazing elbow-to-foot door maneuver and got in, only to be told that they closed in 8 minutes and they couldn't help me. They directed me to the store down the road which was open for another hour and I reluctantly grabbed my stack and headed over there.

Upon arriving, I was greeted with the lack of parking I was expecting and had to trudge across the parking lot trying not to leave a breadcrumb trail of games as I walked to the store. After finally getting in and setting everything down, the transaction began... 25 minutes later and several "I can't believe you're selling these" comments from the clerk, we finally finished. All in all I sold 40 games and pocketed $95. As if that wasn't heartbreaking enough, due to a special Gamestop was having I could get an additional 40% value if I took store credit instead of cash. It came out to about $165. That's a $70 loss. Oh well and extra $100 in the pocket never hurt anyone. :)

Also, I've received the world's longest receipt. The Guinness guys are supposed to be calling me back anytime now... :)

Oh, how quickly we forget

2009-03-25T21:41:00.000-07:00

I don't know if anyone remembers 17 years ago when the Vice President of the United States of America "corrected" a kid in New Jersey for misspelling potato (he said it was potatoe). This crap made international news. Everyone talked about it in the days following and to this day it's one of the few things I remember about that administration (I was in first grade when Bush Sr. was sworn in) <- don't judge :). I swung by a sandwich shop at lunch today to grab a quick... lunch, and came across the following sign:

I was so distracted by it that I started at the wrong end of the line (i.e. the paying side not the ordering side). I was quickly admonished by the cashier for breaking protocol and shooed to the correct side. This meant passing the sign a few more times. I walked to the ordering counter and fighting the urge to snap a photo. I placed my order and returned to the paying counter, causing me to pass the sign again. This was too much for my willpower to fend off. I tried to slyly take a picture using the old look at the menu mounted on the back wall and take the picture without looking; this resulted in a blurry white band draping across my phone screen. I glimpsed out of the corner of my eye and noticed the cashier totally saw me, and she did not look happy. But I still needed the photo, they misspelled the word not once, but multiple times and didn't even try to hide it (I see Patoto, Pototo, Patato, and finally Potatoe). So I took a second photo. I framed the shot, focused, and shot. Cashier, not happy. She gave me the dirtiest looks I've seen in a long time. Had I already had my food paid for and in my possession, I would have taken a picture of her too, but it wasn't so.

That deserves recognition! Either frown upon the lack of spell checking for a business sign or celebrate the brazen disregard for the social norm of "correctness". But either way you've got to give them credit. I am a little curious to go back tomorrow and see if it's still there.

PS: I did not take pleasure in pissing the cashier off, nor did I take the photo to piss her off. I am not the muckraker you may think, but it was a funny enough story to update my month long blog drought. :) I'm baaaaaaack!

/double double checking he didn't misspell any words on this post

Quality Control took Valentine's Day off

2009-02-21T10:26:00.000-08:00

Every year as Valentine's day approaches and in the weeks following I become addicted to Sweethearts. There really is no explanation for it, the texture equivalent of chewing chalk.

One thing I noticed this year, during the consumptions of pounds of these talkative little treats was, Necco's quality control department must have taken the holiday off. I could only read the message on about one of every four hearts out of the box. Some of the "ink" was way off center, others were pock marked, some completely blank, and others were cracked in half.

Below is a sampling of a single box (they all looked like this), I didn't pick the bad ones out, I just poured them out and flipped them over:

But seeing as this is about the only time of year these things are relevant, I can understand why half-assing them might be acceptable, oh wait, no... I can't.

Netflix/Latitude/Recite [Tech Tuesday (Really late)]

2009-02-21T10:00:00.000-08:00

Here comes another onslaught of Windows Mobile applications I've found rather interesting in the past few weeks.

Netflix
First is the Mobile Manager for Netflix released on the Windows Mobile Access page (thanks @windowsmobile) . Its a small application that connects you directly to your Netflix account. The application gives you the ability to view your queues (both DVD and instant) as well as add movies to either. Another nice feature is the ability to view trailers for most movies from your search results without having to go through your phone's browser.

Registration is required for download, but as always your Windows LIVE ID is will be your ticket (same ID as Windows Live, Hotmail, Xbox LIVE, etc).

Microsoft Recite
Next up is Microsoft Recite. Currently billed as a "technology preview" its still a bit of a bare boned application. You basically record a reminder message such as "Get eggs, milk, and bacon at the grocery store." Then when you want to search your recordings you simply speak what your looking for like, "grocery store" and the program will search your notes and play back the most relevant message. I tried it a couple times making a few dummy "reminders" and then searching them and it worked flawlessly (that is, until I tried to actually show people how it works). It's a pretty cool application (when it works), and up until this point I've been taking pictures of things I need to remember (serial numbers, registration codes, etc), so this might be a more convenient way to go.

@WMExperts has put together a great article going a little more in depth about the application.

Google Maps Mobile 3.0 with Latitude
Google released an update to their Google Maps Mobile application that now includes Latitude functionality. Latitude basically allows you to quickly see where your friends are (via GPS or cell tower triangulation) and their current Google status (same as Google Talk). It also allows you to quickly IM, call, or search around thier location by clicking their location pin.

Location sharing is controlled via "sharing requests" which are similar to Myspace or Facebook friend requests. You can either accept or deny the request and when accepted you have the option to share your "best location" (usually within 30 meters of your actual location if using GPS), "city level location", or you can hide your location from them (i.e., stalk them :) ). One of the nicest features is you can control your sharing level per friend, so if are sharing with close friends you can share your exact location and share only city level location with acquaintances. You also have the ability to shut off location sharing at anytime (it doesn't always have to run).

It's fun seeing what your friends are doing, but the downside is if you leave the program running it tends to drain your battery. Still, even if you don't use the Latitude functionality, the Google Maps Mobile applications other features definitely make it a must have!

Facebook: "Your soul... is mine!" (not really though) [UPDATED]

2009-02-16T11:43:00.000-08:00

The twitterverse was abuzz today with grumbles and ramblings regarding the new Facebook ToS (terms of service). The feeding frenzy started by an apparent post on The Consumerist. At first glance the new ToS basically gives Facebook perpetual rights, and the right to sub-license (give to a third party) anything you post or upload...even after you cancel your account.

There seems to be a bit of an apocalyptic tone to the original post (which was actually posted almost two weeks after the February 4th update), which caused the panic. The truth of the matter is, we live in such a litigious society that companies are having to take some drastic measures to cover their assets. Yes, the new ToS appears to give Facebook godlike rights, but only when promoting Facebook or Facebook branded products.

There is an excellent counterpoint article written by J. F. Quackenbush on Wet Asphalt (I'm thinking that's a nom de plume) that breaks down the ToS update and what Facebook could and couldn't legally do. You do have to wade through a bit of flaming (against the Consumerist article author), but it's still a good read. Favorite quote from the article:

I just think it's idiotic that hordes of Facebook users, many if not most of whom are regularly participating in all manner of digital piracy, are now all aflutter with the fear that Facebook is going to steal all the money they could be making by selling pictures of their cats.

This ToS seems even more benign than the original Google Chrome ToS, but as I've said before: read the Terms of Service before you click "I Agree"... especially if you disagree.

Update: Here is Facebook's official response to all the hubbub.

My tepid coffee to become more tepid---er

2009-02-12T10:49:00.000-08:00

Rumor has it, over the next year several Starbucks in Fresno will be closing down. And several of them happen to be the ones I frequent the most. When we bought our house, we had a checklist of things we wanted: a nice area, good schools, and easy access to Starbucks: check, check, and check. If and when the proposed Starbucks closures happen I may have to...*gasp*... give up my morning fix, as the one remaining on the way to work will now be packed and is not in a very convenient shopping center. I know whine whine whine, but other than me being grumpy until noon, you have to think about the other ramifications: even though Starbucks seems a bit over saturated in some areas, they still provide jobs to people, particularly college students. The benefits and perks of working there were great, as well as having it on your résumé coming in to your next job (you'd be surprised how stuck on that one fact interviews get).

Below is a map of the proposed "siren slaughter" in my area, lets hope its just a rumor.

XIII [Winning Wednesday]

2009-02-11T12:45:00.000-08:00

Back in 2003 I purchased a game called "XIII" and didn't really know much about the background of it. I was drawn to it by its unique cell-shaded style. After playing through the game I was totally enthralled by it. The game itself is based on the first five volumes of a Franco-Belgiam comic series by the same name. Last Sunday (Feb. 8th), NBC began a two part mini-series based on the same comic. Needless to say I was very interested when I saw the previews for it.

The basic premise of the game/mini-series is a man with no memory, awakes to find himself accused of assassinating the President of the United States and is being hunted by the US government. Although his memory is lost, all of his training and instincts are in tact. Throughout the series he must regain his memories and prove his innocence. If you're thinking this storyline sounds a lot like Robert Ludlum's The Bourne Identity, that's because the writer Jean Van Hamme (art by William Vance) was inspired by Ludlum's book.

I just finished watching part 1 via Hulu and have to say this is definitely worth checking out. The final part of the mini-series is on NBC next Sunday from 9pm to 11pm (at least on the west coast) and stars Val Kilmer (as The Mongoose) and Stephen Dorff (as XIII).

If you missed part one its available on Hulu: XIII mini-series part 1 and NBC.com (requires installation of a plug-in).

Microsoft My Phone and Google Mobile Sync [Tech Tuesday]

2009-02-10T07:26:00.001-08:00

Switching phones has often been a bittersweet thing for many people. On one hand you have a nice shiny new phone, that can do a bunch of new things. But on the other hand you have to re-enter your contacts and other vital information. And what about your pictures? Music? Ring tones? Most of the time they're gone when you switch phones and you have to take the time to download them all over again.

Some carriers have tried to alleviate some of the pain in getting a new phone by allowing you to sync to their network's servers. Microsoft and Google are trying to make it even easier by providing the service themselves. Coming out in the near future (Date still TBD), Microsoft is releasing the My Phone beta on an invite only basis. The first version of My Phone (formally known as SkyBox), will synchronize the following (up to a max of 200MB) contacts, calendar appointments, tasks, photos, videos, text messages, music, and documents between your phone and your My Phone web account. Any synchronized information will be available to view from a password protected webpage. Syncing all of the information to a new phone, would be as easy as a click. A future release (v 2.0) will also add the ability to completly manage your phone remotely (add applications, change ringtones, etc.). Details are still a bit few and far between as Microsoft "accidentaly" leaked the website early, but rumors are that more information will be given at this month's Mobile World Congress (Feb 16-19).

For those of you who want something now, Google has released the Google Mobile Sync Beta. Blackberry users had the privelage of Google Mobile Sync for sometime now, but now iPhone, Windows Mobile, and Nokia phones are supported. GMS basically syncs your Google Calander and G-mail Contacts with your phone. The WinMo and iPhone versions use the ActiveSync protocol and stays up-to-date throughout the day based on a user defined interval. This also takes care of the problem of switching phones by easily transfering the information from an old phone to the web to the new phone.

If you've been using Outlook to store your contacts/calander events, there is an easy way to transfer your information to Google.

sources:
http://i.gizmodo.com/5148541/microsoft-my-phone-free-mobileme+style-syncing-for-windows-mobile

http://www.google.com/mobile/default/sync.html

http://www.microsoft.com/windowsmobile/myphone/moreinfo.aspx

Hidden embarassment [Life's "metagames"]

2009-02-07T11:56:00.000-08:00

For the most part, I am pretty proud of my musical diversity, I have things in my collection ranging from the 1930's group "The Ink Spots" all the way to some of today's mainstream and indie groups.

There is however, about 2% of my music collection that I am, well... ashamed of. Some of this comes from "Zune freebies", some are residual from a time when my wife and my collections were combined on a single computer (I'm not saying my wife has bad taste, but to have Brittany Spears in my collection is something I often have to explain), and some are guilty pleasures (Third Eye Blind much?). This didn't used to be a problem, as I was able to keep my collection secret from others. But since I bought my Zune and joined the "Zune Social" (which displays your favorites, most played, and recent plays), these little awkward gems occasionally come floating to the top.

The Zune software does a nice little job of taking the album art of several albums in your collection and making a mosaic of them as the background while the player is running. No matter how many times I refresh it, there is at least one of these "shame albums" hidden somewhere in the "quilt". This has led to a little game I play; I call the game: "WTF? Musical Where's Waldo". It goes like this, at any given point I will look at the player and try to find the album that I need to cover with a post-it. Here is a screen shot I took, see if you can play along (click the picture for a blown up version). Look at the album art and when you come across one that makes you say "Why the hell does he have THAT?", you've won!

A point of contention [QotD]

2009-02-06T14:46:00.001-08:00

I find myself constantly having to defend my stance on this position. I try to be open-minded of other people's points-of-view and take the time to hear their side of the argument, but on this one point I have stalwart conviction: Twizzlers are far better than Red Vines. Like most arguments these days I have no good facts or evidence to back up this claim, I just know it.

But which do you prefer? Write a comment to defend your candy of choice.*

*Please note: any comments indicating you prefer Red Vines will be either edited or completely deleted (of course I'm kidding, buy you are wrong)

100th Post!

2009-02-05T12:43:00.000-08:00

So today marks my 100th post on Tepid Coffee and Stale Muffins. I'd like to take the opportunity to thank everybody for stopping by and reading my rants and mindless jabber. I'm glad its at least entertaining enough to keep some of you coming back.

To celebrate I thought I have a giveaway!!!! Unfortunately... I don't have anything to give away. Instead my thanks will have to be enough. :)

So sincerely, thank you for taking time out of your day to hear what I have to say.

Google Earth 5.0 [Tech Tuesday]

2009-02-03T12:50:00.000-08:00

Google Earth has been around since 2004 and even before that (2001) as Keyhole's Earth Viewer. During its transition from a simple GIS viewer to the modern marvel it is today, several features have been added. 3D landscapes, Google map integration, and "Street View" are just a few. In its latest iteration (5.0 beta), Google Earth has added some of its coolest features. Among them are;

Historic Imagery - the ability to use a slider to look at aerials from differant years to see how areas may have developed
Ocean Floor and Surface data - you can now actually go under the surface of the ocean and explore
Simplified touring with audio recordings

If you haven't downloaded before or its been a while since you've taken the Earth for a spin, now is a great time to do it. The free (non-commercial) version is available for download here: http://earth.google.com/. It may seem like a lot of information at first, but it definitely becomes addicting and you'll find yourself checking out famous landmarks or places you've been, into the wee hours.

If you get tired of touring the globe, a few releases ago Google Earth also included "Sky view" which allows you to "explore" space as well. And if that still isn't enough check out Google Mars.

Both of these require an internet connection, but if you're reading this blog you most likely have that covered. Enjoy!

Neither snow nor rain nor heat... [craponomics]

2009-02-02T13:07:00.000-08:00

Back in 2001 (after September 11th and the anthrax mailings), The United States Postal Service ran an ad campaign quoting a translation of Herodotus' Histories which has often been falsely attributed to the USPS creed and went as follows:

We are mothers and fathers. And sons and daughters. Who every day go about our lives with duty, honor and pride. And neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night, nor the winds of change, nor a nation challenged, will stay us from the swift completion of our appointed rounds. Ever.

Terrible weather may not stop the mail from being delivered, but according to the USPS, one force seems to be able to halt the courier's work... The economy. The USPS is now discussing cutting down their delivery schedule from the typical six-day model (Monday - Saturday) to a five-day model.

I think its interesting that the Postal Service is blaming the economy for the downturn in demand. With competitive rates from parcel carriers such as UPS and FedEx (but with better tracking options and automatic insurance) and the widespread use of the internet, it seems to me as if the USPS has ran its course much like the Pony Express. With e-mail, electronic banking, fax machines, and the aforementioned couriers; I honestly haven't "mailed" anything in quite some time. (But someone still needs to deliver your magazine subscriptions.)

Side note: The USPS seems to have taken down the link to their TV campaign from their website.

Also for the record, the USPS is not a government agency, they are simply an independent private corporation protected and heavily regulated by the federal government.

Seriously?... How to Grind? [WTF?]

2009-01-30T16:24:00.000-08:00

For those of you who couldn't care less about me whining about my broken toy, I will share this little bit of joy with you. On my iGoogle homepage I have several little boxes that I don't really pay much attention to very often, but are there in case I get really bored. Case-in-point: the How to of the day, which displays the title of three "How-To" articles the change everyday.

The other day I went to search for something and out of the corner of my eye I caught the title "How to grind". I kind of laughed thinking to myself "surely they are talking about skateboarding" (this is specifically addressed in the "article"). Nope.

If you need a laugh [or lesson], please check out this story. This shows the dark side of user generated content (and why Wikipedia is not a reliable source for your research paper). But you have to give credit to the person who could actually type the following line and still hit the save button:

If repositioning does not work, you may want to excuse yourself for a few minutes to let things settle down.

Bonus: it comes with Tips, Warnings, and a video tutorial.

http://www.wikihow.com/Grind

Why I am WISHING for an RRoD...

2009-01-30T15:15:00.000-08:00

Keegan got up a bit early this morning and since I was off today, I decided I'd take him downstairs to watch a DVD with me while mommy slept. Since we had a finite space for entertainment components (and the DVR takes up three quarters of it), we decided to sell our DVD player and just use the Xbox 360. This little arrangement had worked out fine... until today. I went to turn on the 360 to put in a disc and that's when I saw it...

(Sign you are about to have an 8 lb paperweight)

Now at first this didn't bother me, because I saw this same error message (E74) the other day and just took the Hard Drive off and put it back on and then everything was fine. Not this time though. It has now been a full 12 hours and every time its the same result. I looks like its officially dead.

So that got me a little upset as it was, but I remembered Microsoft had automatically extended their warranty period for the 360s because of their horrible failure rate (around 16.4% last year when they extended the warranty). So I did a little research and found out the extended warranty only covers the infamous Red Ring of Death (RRoD), which is three red flashing lights. My error is covered under the standard warranty... which expired JANUARY 2ND!!! So now I have a few options here:

Pay the out of warranty repair fee ($95 or approximately HALF the cost of a new system)
Buy a new system (yeah... right)
Try to fix it myself (voiding the extended warranty)
MAKE it get the Red Ring of Death (oops! shit! I thought that was a bag of microwave popcorn)

Regardless, I always kind of felt like I was biding my time with the console until it crap out on me.

Wait... what's this dusty white thing with the glowing blue light? /Sings: Baby comeback...

Yeah... Nice try! [WTF?]

2009-01-29T16:28:00.000-08:00

Today my office informally (read: pay for yourself) went out to lunch to celebrate one of our co-worker's last day. Since it was her lunch, it was her pick of the restaurant we would eat at, she chose Romano's Macaroni Grill. I wasn't too excited about the pick since Natali and I had gone out to dinner there and the service was sub-par at best. But I figured, its not my lunch and maybe the lunch service will be a little better. We got there and the restaurant was practically empty. There were only two other tables of customers and our group of ten easily doubled the number of patrons. We quickly learned why the restaurant was so empty, the lunch service is no better than the dinner. Despite the sparse number of eaters, it still took us over an hour to get our food (which is our entire lunch break), even every person except one ordered salads or sandwiches! I usually judge our service based on the number of times I have to slurp out of the bottom of my water cup. ( Total number of water refills during the 90 minute lunch: 1). Of course because of the size of our group (even though we split the bill in to two halves of the table) the gratuity was added into the bill automatically (at 18%, which is way more than I would have tipped for the ridiculously bad service).

Side note: My method of tipping at a restaurant goes as such: you start off at a 15% tip. You earn "points" for good service and lose "points" for bad service. At the end of the dinner, your tip is 15% +/- the number of points. (everything ends up relating to a game for me)

We quickly divided up the bill and everyone gave their cash so I could put the bill on the card (I forgot to go to the ATM). My original receipt had two totals on it: the first was the bill and tax ($53.70) and the second was with the bill, tax, and 18% tip ($62.65). I stuck my card in the folder and handed it back to the server. When he returned, he had the two receipts (my copy and the original) folded in half on the left side and the "restaurant copy" on the right side facing me. Since we were now 20 minutes past when we should have been back at the office, I quickly added the the $9.00 tip to my "charge amount" and signed it. I set it down grabbed my jacket and headed toward the door... WAIT! I went back and looked at the receipt. The charge amount included my tip! I scratched out the tip amount and wrote a big "0" in both the "tip amount" and "additional tip" (WTF? and why is this one "optional").

I'm still a little pissed about that. The Caesar salad that I didn't order, almost cost me twenty bucks!*

I actually ordered a chicken plate, but instead got a caesar salad, since it was taking so long and I didn't have time to get my actual order. :(

ETA: I don't know how I didn't see this, but on the back of the main receipt is... yep, you guessed it a "Guest Experience Survey". I get to complain AND I have a chance to win $1,000! :)

Fresno (No. 1 for a good reason!) [Winning Wednesday]

2009-01-28T11:24:00.001-08:00

It's nice to open your paper and actually see a "good" story about your city.

Among large California (the most populous state in the US) cities, Fresno tied with Huntington Beach for diverting the most trash from its landfills.

"In 2006, both cities sent 71% of solid waste to recycling programs, according to the most recent data available from the California Integrated Waste Management Board".

That's pretty awesome! It's nice to make the top of a list that doesn't involve air pollution, murder, or methamphetamine.

Source: The Fresno Bee

Today's lesson: humanity

2009-01-27T07:27:00.001-08:00

I was at Starbucks this morning (I know...BIG surprise), purchasing my morning coffee. As I reached the line there were two people in front of me and the first was finishing up her order. In the 15 seconds it took me to walk to the line and pull my wallet out of my pocket six people fell into place behind me, including a few "regulars" I recognized. My brother works at this particular Starbucks, so the baristas know me and were pouring my coffee as I walked in. Several of the other people in line were [actual] coffee drinkers and the barista scrambled to get their orders ready ahead of time as well. As the coffees started piling up on the counter the first lady took back her card and began to walk away. The cashier said thank you and as she was about to help the next customer she glanced at the register and noticed there was a balance of 80 cents. The cashier kindly called to the previous customer and alerted her of the situation. The customer explained she'd have to go to her car to get the balance and walked out with an embarrassed look as the line came to a halt.

Let me break here and give you a bit of a sidebar. I know its not fair to "judge a book by its cover", and this is something I try to follow. The things that most people get caught up on like (skin color, tattoos, sexual orientation, etc) don't really cause me to prejudice myself. However, there are a few things that I still need to work on. If people have any of the following, they have basically start "in the hole" and have to prove me wrong:

NASCAR stickers on their car (I know, I know, its a sport...)
Ponytail on men over 40 (I think they look ridiculous on men period, but have a particularly hard time with the 40+ crowd)
Bushy mustaches (men or women :) )

Back to my story...

As the women made it to the door, a man handed the cashier a dollar. It was one of the regulars, a retired man, probably 5'3, bright yellow nylon jumpsuit, long grey ponytail, and a bushy mustache. The cashier thought initially thought (as did I) the man was being rude and trying to sneak in payment for a newspaper. He quickly explained it was to cover the lady's balance. The line began moving again, and when the woman returned she was elated that someone had come to her assistance and promptly thanked the man.

I felt kind of bad. I saw this man everyday, and every time I saw him I rolled my eyes. Not anymore... now I just have to work on the NASCAR stickers.

SIDENOTE: As I was typing this, it began to feel like a cheesy email forward. If this was an email forward it seems like it would probably end with "...and the woman pulled a gun out of her purse and handed it to the man. She then explained with a tear in her eye, 'I was going to use this on myself later but your kindness has shown me humanity still has some good...'" :)

Just send me a message on {insert social network}!

2009-01-26T13:05:00.001-08:00

The other day, some friends and myself were trying to make some plans to have a "gaming night" via Facebook's message board. These nights usually involve Call of Duty 4, Rock Band 2, pizza, and lots of alcohol.

As we were trying to make plans another opportunity came up that I thought one of my friends might want to do, so I text messaged him to see if he was interested. After a few minutes a response came by way of the Facebook board. It was at this point I realized there are entirely too many ways to get a hold of each other. So many, that it almost makes it impossible to effectively communicate. I did an inventory of ways to "send me a message":

Facebook Profile
LinkedIn Profile
G-mail
Google Talk
Yahoo Mail
Microsoft LIVE Space
XBox LIVE
Zune Social
Microsoft Messenger
Yahoo Messenger
Twitter
Blog Comments
Raptr Profile
360voice.com/gamerDNA profile
Work email
Text Message
Voice mail
Work phone
House phone
Cell phone <---At least I think my phone can receive calls

And I know that I probably forgot a bunch of other ways to "reach" me, but my point is, out of all of those, only about five actually are read on a consistant basis: Talk, Twitter, text messages, phone calls and G-mail (although almost everything else filters into my G-mail account). So if you sent me a message and I haven't responded to you, it is because either A) I didn't get it, or B) I got it, but am too lazy to go to the appropriate website to respond

So how about you, can you think of all the ways people can "communicate" with you?

Fact Friday: Me

2009-01-23T15:13:00.000-08:00

What this guy has done in his lifetime:

My wife (Thinking Blonde) took this from another blog she reads (Seriously), and it has appeared on several others.

It is Friday... I am on a break... I am bored... and have nothing else to post. So I will steal it too. :)

The things that are bold, I have done. The things that are italicized, are things I want to do. Stuff that's regular text, I haven't done nor do I feel compelled to do. Enjoy.

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band <---Only if Rock Band counts :)
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise <----Dinner cruise in San Diego, but not an actual cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language <---- Does C# count?
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris <----I've been under it though
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby <---Well not personally, but my wife did :) 95. Seen the Alamo in person 96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day

That's me. Feel free to use any of this information against me in a court of law.

I just threw up in my mouth and LMFAO at the same time!!!

2009-01-21T23:52:00.001-08:00

Disclaimer: It is midnight so this post might be just a bunch of misspelled words put together on the page in no particular order. Also the video on here is slightly NSFW, depending on how strict your workplace is (but if its that strict you probably shouldn't be surfing the internet right now anyway).

Natali and I were watching a DVRed episode of House last night that was recorded back in September. I had the requisite popcorn in one hand and Twizzlers in the other. Normally we use the "skip ahead" button to jump ahead 30 seconds at a time during the commercial breaks. I was jumping forward when we caught a glimpse of a Trojan box on a magazine page which piqued our curiosity (I know real mature huh?). So I hit the "back" button and went to the beginning of the commercial.

Here it is in its entirety, but please pay attention to around 0:35 (this video is mildly NSFW):

Nat and I literally turned and stared at each other. Did she just...ugh!

A: this commercial is on midday, why?
B: TMI!
C: You are old
D: DO NOT roll you eyes at some "silly youngsters" just before you are about to tell them where you got your fingertip electric toothbrush that you giggidy giggidy yourself with

If that wasn't enough fun, please please pleeeeese go to the youtube page and read through some of the comments.

But does it come in pink?

2009-01-21T15:18:00.000-08:00

I was perusing my RSS feeds while at work (its up on the side of my screen) and came across an article from Gizmodo.com called "Win 7 Beta Tip: Gadgets Are Integrated Directly onto the Desktop, But Are Slightly Buggy". I was curious, since I've been using Windows 7 for several days now (and so far LOVE it) and have also been following gizmodo's reports as they've been putting it through its paces. I clicked on it and quickly read through the article, realizing that the tip wasn't really news to me, but the critique was helpful (I'm still a stubborn XP user and have had all of maybe an hour hands on time with Vista).

Something to note, (you'll see the pun in a second), is Gizmodo tends to be very pro-Apple, as it rightfully should be considering their target demographic (techies and graphic designers). So it interested me when I came across the part of the article that said

[The] Notes gadget is not installed by default—I was surprised to find it missing, but instead I found a program called Sticky Notes that is apparently intended to replace it. Accessible from the Start Menu under Accessories, the Sticky Notes will actually resize to its contents unlike the Vista gadget. It’s an overall improvement, but the notes lack the ability to customize your font and the ability to change the opacity. But it does bring Windows 7 up to OS X's Stickies in desktop-level sticky note functionality. (emphasis added by me)

It was pretty funny to see that particular sentence regarding Windows 7. Here is a new product that is basically a "do or die" situation for the Windows operating system (another Vista would likely kill them), and here a respectable tech blog (Gizmodo, not this one, obviously) is debating how well it emulates "technology" from 1977.

Microsoft must be doing something right if one of the major factors in buying Mac or Windows in the future boils down to "Sticky preference"

BTW: Regarding the post title: yes, you can change the sticky note color to blue, green, pink, purple, white, or yellow.

How did they not see a month delay ahead of time?

2009-01-20T17:40:00.001-08:00

Being both "gamers"and snowboarders, my brother and I were really excited about the upcoming snowboarding game, Stoked. It had been a while since either of us had purchased a snowboarding game and Stoked had some exciting features, great reviews, and an awesome price point ($20 less than most Xbox 360 games).

We originally heard about the game back in November, while following the PAX event, so needless to say the wait has been a while. I may seem a bit nerdy to get excited about a game (especially, from a small developer), but its no more nerdy than getting excited about the next Twilight movie. Anyway, we'd been keeping an eye on the game and the development process, getting ever more ready for its release, and today was the day! Back in December on its official blog, posted December 4th the game's developer announced the game's release date as January 20th, 2009. Earlier today I got an e-mail from ign.com (an entertainment website) that detailed the upcoming releases this month, Stoked wasn't on there.

I did a little investigation and checked ign's release date site, strangely it said the game was being released on January 26th... Huh? So I went to gamestop.com and found the game but it said it was being shipped on FEBURARY 24th???? I decided to go straight to the source and went back to their official blog here is what was posted:

Dear Fans,

Stoked is a highly anticipated title and has been subjected to aggressive testing to provide the consumer with the best play experience yet. As a result, Stoked is being held, and will come to consumers in February 2009. The official release date is February 24th.

We deeply apologize in advance to our fans and loyal supporters for the delays. Thanks for your support and we assure you it will be well worth the wait...

This was posted on January 20th at 11:52 am... TODAY! How can a company not foresee a month long delay sooner than the day it is supposed to be in the hands of its consumers?!?!? What could possibly have happened at the last minute to cause this? I don't know, but it all seems a bit sketch.

But on the bright side I get to keep playing the waiting game for free in the meantime.

Photo taken from developer blog at http://gettingstoked.com/blog/2009/01/20/stoked-delayed-until-february-24th/.

Tech Tuesday: Microsoft Photosynth

2009-01-20T13:01:00.000-08:00

Photosynth is a project currently in the Microsoft "Live Labs". The idea of it is that it takes several uploaded photos and using reference points, creates a photo "quilt". By using the free software to view these quilts you get a sort of 3D perspective of a particular site. Developed to help splice together tourist photos to create the essence of "being there", this technology has recently been pushed into the limelight; as CNN partnered with Microsoft to present a Photosynth of the inauguration today. To view some of the other synths available, or to make your own you'll need to download two applications: Silverlight (for web viewing) and the actual Photosynth application. Both applications are free.

One of my favorite synths is called The Nose (MacDuff the golden retriever).

A few things to know (taken from http://photosynth.net/learn.aspx):

This first version of Photosynth has some limitations that you need to be aware of:

All synths are uploaded. They're big, so you need to use a broadband Internet connection.
All synths are public. Your photos will be visible to everyone on the Internet.
Like the viewing experience, the "synther" only runs on PCs (XP and Vista).
You'll need to Sign Up for a Photosynth account. It uses Windows Live ID.

For tips on how to get the best results when making your own synth, check out our guide or just watch the How to Synth video.

Note from me: You already have a Windows Live ID if you use any of the following: Xbox LIVE, Zune Social, MSN, hotmail, Windows Live Messenger, XNA Creators Club (basically if you have ever done any anything with Microsoft before)

If anyone reading this does a Synth, post a link in the comments. I'd be really interested in seeing it! Get out your digital camera and get to shooting!

Source: http://livelabs.com/photosynth/
Photo: by Tan_Nguyen

You know you're in the middle of a recession when...

2009-01-19T13:12:00.001-08:00

...you book a trip on "Best Tours" bus line and end up in a Wal-Mart parking lot.

Note: there are a ton of parking lots closer to major highways and restaurants than this particular Wal-Mart, leading me to believe this was neither a rest stop nor pick-up. Also in the shopping center of this Wal-Mart, there is nothing but a cigarette shop (closed), beauty supply shop (closed), pizza parlor (closed), and a McDonalds (waaaaaaaaaaay on the other side of the shopping center, about 2000 feet away from the bus). My conclusion, this was the destination of this trip. :)

I'm worried about my marriage

2009-01-18T18:29:00.000-08:00

My wife has been infatuated with another man. I've tried to give her the benefit of the doubt and look away. But now I've found the bastard IN MY HOUSE! And what's worse is, it appears my in-laws are actually encouraging the relationship; since they are the ones who invited him into our home. Please if you ever see this man around town, give him a stiff kick in the nards! :)

A Testament to my efficiency (or messiness)

2009-01-16T16:16:00.001-08:00

WARNING: This post contains some disturbing material, I apologize in advance and hope you don't lose all respect for me.

I decided that while Keegan was taking a nap to day I would clean out my car. This is quite a task and usually only happens two to three times a year. If you know me, you know I like statistics, and even better if they are stupid stats.

So I present to you, Stupid Useless Statistics from me cleaning out my extremely messy car:

Number of tools recovered: 1 (philips screwdriver)
Number of writing utencils recovered: 4
Number of water bottles found: 7
Number of paystubs found: 3
Amount of money recovered: 27¢
Days between today and date of oldest newspaper found:135 (September 3, 2008)
Capacity of cups/cans containing caffinated beverages (in fl oz): 616.8 (4.8 gallons)
Number of cups/cans from above that were not Red Bull, Starbucks, or Cherry Coke Zero: 0

Dollar amount of reciepts (excluding ATM reciepts): 675.44 (60 found)
Percent of dollars from above reciepts used to purcase fast food: 46
Smallest "total" amount on a reciept found: 0.54
Number of days old of the oldest piece of trash (with a known date): 146 (Vegas bus ticket)
Grossest thing found: An entire Jack in the Box taco (<--yeah, it grossed me out too)
Number of owners of that car that will try to make less of a mess: 1

So as you can see from the photos what I did was actually quite impressive. I managed to fit all of that in my car in a very compact space. I dare you, no... challenge you to try and fit all of that in the front passenger seat of your car.

(For the record I keep the back seat clean, so I don't lose my son like that banned IKEA commercial)

WWJD [2GC]? (What Would Jesus Do [to get chicks]?

2009-01-15T13:36:00.000-08:00

I was on my way back to work from lunch yesterday when this truck cut me off at the last second in order to get in the turn lane (that I was in). I pulled up behind the truck a little perturbed but minding my own business when I noticed the "Jesus Fish" [1] on this truck's bumper. I chuckled to myself immediately thinking of "the Golden Rule" ("...do to others what you would have them do to you..." [Matthew 7:12 NIV] <---Yeah...from the Bible). Then immediately to the right of the fish sticker I see another bumper sticker that says "The number one cause of divorce is MARRIAGE" [2]. That made me laugh a little harder considering the proximity of the two stickers and the HUGE recent debate over the sanctity of marriage (CA Prop. 8). My curiosity was now piqued and I went from sticker to sticker reading what they said. Here are some of the highlights: [3] "A, B, C, D, E, F*CKYOU", [4] "P*SSY RULES", and then finally to top it off, [5] a picture of Jesus' face, looking directly at all of the other stickers.

Now look through them again, in order: Jesus fish, marriage=bad, f*ck you, p*ssy rules, Jesus.

I don't know if my camera captured it, but I think he miiiiight be crying.

Winning Wednesday: Twitter

2009-01-14T09:56:00.001-08:00

So most people by now have heard about Twitter. For those that haven't, in a nutshell its a "micro-blogging" service that allows you to shoot "what you're doing" into cyberspace. You can subscribe (follow) to anyone's tweets and get updates in a variety of ways. There are several client applications available for a variety of platforms.

I had heard about Twitter for months, but just chocked it up to being a Facebook status updater. I've been using it now for about two months and I have to say I am addicted. Its a lot of fun, most of the time people make rhetorical posts and aren't expecting a response. People are using the service to not only update people on what they are doing, but also to get important announcements, savings opportunities, and even political information. If you are interested in a particular subject or company, you can follow their PR person's tweets and get real-time updates on what's going on. Here is a list put together by Sam Houston(@samhouston) of gamerDNA (snagged from @fourzerotwo) that lists gaming companies on twitter. You never know who you'll find with a little searching.

Here are a few tips to people who may be new on twitter:

if you see the at symbol (e.g. @ignium) that is reffering to someone's twitter username (and is usually a hyperlink, just click to go to their profile).
you can send someone a reply by using @username
if you want to send someone a direct message that no one else can see (similar to a text message) type d in front of the username then your message (e.g. d ignium Hey!).
if you want to "group" posts from multiple users together start a "hatch tag", and example of this is people at airports wanting to know what other people at airports are doing used #boardingLAX. This grouped all the posts of people boarding at LAX together.
the official list of twitter commands is HERE.

If you have any questions feel free to leave it in the comments or shoot me an email or tweet me (http://twitter.com/ignium). I also post my tweets on the sidebar of this page.

To my surprise I received this email earlier today (I'm sure he follows all of his followers).

More info about twitter:

Twitter Wikipedia page

About Twitter page

Tech Tuesday: Windows Live Writer

2009-01-13T13:21:00.001-08:00

This is a product that has been around for a while, but I’ve just recently come across it while installing the Windows 7 Beta (which I’m using as I type). It’s called Windows Live Writer and is basically a word processor specifically designed for blogging.

It has the very familiar feel of Blogger’s online editor (I’m sure the other blogging services are nearly the same as far as editing) but also the ability to save a local draft of any post. What’s the benefit of this? I generally use a laptop for my personal computing needs and because of this, when I’m out and about I don’t always have an internet connection. This allows me to write posts even when not connected, like say, on my lunch (where I have 30 – 60 minutes) as opposed to on my break (15 min) and then I can just plug it in when I get back and… SHAZAM! Post published! It may seem like a little thing, but its nice to take my time and I am not restricted to Starbucks or McDonalds to use their free internet.

You may also be wondering, “Why not just use Word?”. Well my friends, that’s because I have tried using Word and then copying and pasting the post into Blogger. First of all, it takes extra steps. Second: unpredictable results, your formatting tends to get “lost in translation” and you have a jumbled mess instead of a post which adds extra steps, now that you have to go back and fix it. This is quicker and easier.

Set up is a breeze which basically involves typing your blog’s URL (in my case http://tepidcoffee.blogspot.com), my user name, and password. The program does everything else from there. It even downloads a “theme” which customizes the colors of Live Writer to those of your blog. You have the ability post using the basic editor (equivalent to the “Compose” tab on blogger) or you can even edit the source code (Edit Html), and even preview your post (offline too!). Another nice thing for you people who refuse to listen to me when I say “stop using Internet Explorer!”, is that Live Writer has the same real-time spell checker (which Firefox has built in) that you’re used to in other MSFT products like Word (red squiggly lines under misspelled words).

Windows Live Writer is part of a suite of products called Windows LIVE Essentials which is available for free and includes the following nifty programs:

Windows Live Call (added VoIP feature to Messenger)
Windows Live Messenger (formerly Microsoft Messenger)
Windows Live Mail (formerly Outlook Express)
Windows Movie Maker [Beta] (haven’t spent much time with this yet)
Windows Live Photo Gallery (essentially Microsoft's version of Picasa)
Windows Family Safety (similar to Net Nanny)
Windows Live Writer (um… what I’ve been talking about)

To download the suite or for more information visit: http://download.live.com/ and is available for Windows XP (SP2 or higher), Vista, and 7 beta.

It’s free so it’s at least worth a look! Happy blogging!

That sheep is forking funny!

2009-01-12T07:49:00.000-08:00

Two or so weeks ago my family went on our ritual Sunday morning breakfast at a local cafe (La Parisian on Palm & Nees) and enjoyed brunch with both sets of parents. It was a nice morning as usual, lounging around, eating crepes, and enjoying the frigid morning air. Once Keegan's naptime was approaching, we decided to go home before he had a "tired toddler explosion".

As a way to teach K new words and situations we often play the "what's that" game, asking him the name of something we see. On the way home a fire truck drove by with its lights and siren on, naturally we asked "Keegan, what's that?", to which he replied "F*CK!" with a big grin on this face. Natali and I just looked at each other. At first both our jaws were on the ground and we had sort of a deer in the headlights look about us. That look slowly melted into uproarious laughter (but trying to hide it, so we didn't reinforce that particular pronunciation). As we gathered ourselves, we took turns enunciating very carefully: f-eye-er T-r-uh-k. As he tried to repeat, he slowly responded: "Ahhhh fuuuuu*k". Hilarity ensued until both Nat and I were crying from trying to keep our laughter hidden.

The reason I bring this up now is that I think I have to have my "Parental License" suspended for a few days. My parents came over for dinner yesterday and I wanted to show off my son's new vernacular. I brought out a fork (which evokes a similar response) and asked, "Keegan, what's this?". To my dismay he responded "forrrrk". We praised him and gave him a round of applause, but in my head I was disappointed. How sad is that? I already miss the fun I could have had with that one. :)

This one is for the ladies...

2009-01-09T10:22:00.001-08:00

In stark contrast to my techy nerd post yesterday, here is a post about fashion (sort of).

I went to my co-worker's office to ask if she had any work that she needed my help on. As I walked in she said "Oh! You have a wife... you'll appreciate this". Now that is one of those phrases sends shivers down my spine. Following that phrase, I've had women tell me stories that had too many TMI facts to count. I don't know your birthday, why do you think I care how frequently or intensely you menstruate (unless you ARE my wife, in which case this information is very useful). So as a side note to women who work around or even know men, here is the rule to remember: Having a wife/girlfriend/sister does NOT equal having a vagina. We may understand whats going on, but doesn't mean we want to know what's going on (as I'm sure other women don't want to know sometimes).

Anyway, back to my story. She showed me two pairs of pants that she had taken to a tailor to get "patched". My first thought, was why the hell does anyone get jeans patched? Then she pulled them out and I noticed the [for me] terrifying yellow swoopy stitch of Sevens. If you're a married man and don't understand why Sevens are terrifying click here (scary huh). So taking a $200 pair of pants to get stitched seems like a good move... unless you use this guy. She had dropped off a few things and was kind of going through them when she saw the jeans. This is how they turned out:

Yeah... pretty much completely ruined.

As she came across them in the pile she jumped and asked, "What have you done to my jeans?" The tailor, flabbergasted by this question, responded that he had fixed them just as she asked. My co-worker explained that these jeans were unwearable as anything but PJs now... the tailor disagreed. His wife soon walked in and my co-worker asked her, "Would you wear these out of the house?" The tailor's wife explained that if she had a long coat it wouldn't really be a problem (if you look at the bottom picture, you can see the original hole wasn't even that big). So their solution was to pay them $20 per pair of pants the "fixed" and then hide it... nice.

The bright side is you can think of it as getting a pair of "distressed" Sevens for 90% off!

Vista now OFFICIALLY the red-headed stepchild everyone knew it was

2009-01-08T08:54:00.000-08:00

Steve Ballmer (whom is the CEO of Microsoft, not Bill Gates <--Retired) made some pretty exciting announcements at this years Consumer Electronics Show (CES). One of the announcements was the public availabilty of the new Microsoft OS simply known as Windows 7. The beta will be publicly available tomorrow (Friday Jan 9) to the first 2.5 Million people who download it. The new operating system is promised to be more reliable and user friendly than Microsoft's current operating system, Vista. One thing to note about the beta is, you can only upgrade from Vista SP1 (i.e., you can't go from XP to 7). Currently Microsoft is working on cheap upgrade programs to make the transition a little less bitter for people who may have recently forked out cash for Vista.

This basically ends the "Vista era" and now we can all move on (unless you're Apple's marketing director).

For some more information on the new OS, some of its new features, or its intened mid-2009 release date check out some of these links:

Winning Wednesday: Starbucks' Bella Vista

2009-01-07T08:28:00.000-08:00

This is my all time favorite coffee. It was discontinued a few years back (I think around 2003) and I'm so happy that it's back!

It's called Costa Rica Bella Vista F.W. Tres Rios (phew...), and is categorized as a medium roast. It is a really "bright" (high acidity) coffee so it pairs well with citrusy foods that complement its acidity, like lemon bars or strawberries. I love the first sip of Bella Vista in the morning, you literally feel the coffee lift your ears (its hard to describe). This coffee is great no matter how its made, but is of course at its best when made in a French press (paper filters tend to trap the coffee beans' oil which is where the flavor is).

Here is the "official" description:

"In the rolling hills outside San Jose, this coffee is cultivated on one of the region's oldest and last remaining estates. Guided by a proud tradition of quality and the long-term support of Starbucks, the owners have perfected time-honored farming methods to harvest and process the beans right on the estate, and established social programs to improve the farmers' livelihoods. Always a favorite in our tasting room, Bella Vista is surprisingly complex with a satisfying citrus sparkle, floral notes evocative of orange blossoms and a refreshing finish."

My description:

"It's delicious!"

So next time you are at Starbucks pick up a pound or two (I don't think they brew it as the coffee of the day) or at least ask the barista to sample the coffee. You'll be glad you did.

This is NOT intimidating

2009-01-06T14:39:00.000-08:00

I was at Target yesterday and happened upon this amazing sight. Its the "Target Assets Protection-mobile". This has to be one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. I'm not 100% on this, but I think they have a "uniformed" AP person, riding around on this thing making sure people don't steal things or cause fights (covering their assets.. *sigh*).

I think it ends up being a double-edged sword though. This three-wheeled marvel actually makes me want to shoplift, just so I can see a security guard come out on this thing. On the other hand I don't think I'd get to far because I would probably pee my pants from laughing so hard.

Seriously! This might be more effective and it is way scarier:

Tech Tuesday: First Down Yellow Line

2009-01-06T10:56:00.000-08:00

If you know me, you know I'm not really a "sports fan". I enjoy occasionally watching sports, but I don't usually change my plans in order to watch a game. That said, I have to say that some of the graphics (yellow first down line, the blue puck tracker in hockey, etc) that the broadcasting stations add to help the fans watch the game are really quite nice and I think it makes watching sports more accessible to people who might not normally care. Its a lot easier to say "they have to cross that yellow line" instead of "well when that team gets possession of the ball, they have four tries to go a total of ten yards, each time they are tackled that is one try and they have to make it ..." blah blah blah.

What I didn't realize was how much technology actually goes into making those things happen. This story came up on my RSS reader from gizmodo.com, have a watch, it's pretty neat.

The City's "Smiley"

2009-01-06T08:34:00.000-08:00

If you recall, I made a post a few months back about how smiley faces at the end of a to do list (or any other place where the person reading it would not normally smile) drive me crazy. They just feel patronizing.

Well here is another thing that bugs me: Holiday greetings directly below the "NOW DUE" amount on my utility bill.

I read it like this. Give us $107 or your trash will pile up, your street will not be swept, and you will have no water... oh yeah and Merry effin Christmas."

[EDITED] Zune Harakiri [Apple Fans Not Welcome :)]

2008-12-31T13:15:00.000-08:00

Apparently the internet is abuzz with the recent bricking of thousands of Zunes. The phenomenon is being dubbed as Z2K9, Zunicide, or Zunepocolypse and results in a 30GB Zune basically crapping out. Reports are that at about around 2AM this morning the fated Zunes reset and tried to reboot, once the status bar reached 100%... nothing, they just freeze there. At this time no solution has been found and it only seems to affect 30GB Zunes (regardless of firmware version). If you have a Zune 30 my advice is to hold off on using it until the problem is solved. Keep an eye on the Zune support page for any updates: http://www.zune.net/en-US/support/default.htm (Top right corner).

There is a workaround at this point, but it requires you to open up the Zune (which voids the warranty), but if you're feeling daring here's the link: http://www.rapidrepair.com/guides/zune/zuneassemblyguide.htm. My advice is to just wait and see what happens. The software still works without a hitch (Don't plug the Zune 30 in though), so if you're dying to listen to music do it at your computer.

I still think the Zune as a whole, trumps the iPod (hardware, software, and marketplace), probably because I haven't been affected by any of the Microsoft trifecta (BSoD, RRoD, Z2K9). Its bad enough I have to hear all the smack talk about Microsoft's Windows OS and their infamous Xbox 360 RRoD, now THIS? Come on guys, I'm trying to fight the good fight here.

ETA: The problem seems to be isolated to Zune 30s manufactured in 2006 and the problem should resolve itself. Matt Akers from the Zune team posted an update to the support forums stating the following:

"Early this morning we were alerted by our customers that there was a widespread issue affecting our 2006 model Zune 30GB devices (a large number of which are still actively being used). The technical team jumped on the problem immediately and isolated the issue: a bug in the internal clock driver related to the way the device handles a leap year. The issue should be resolved over the next 24 hours as the time change moves to January 1, 2009. We expect the internal clock on the Zune 30GB devices will automatically reset tomorrow (noon, GMT). By tomorrow you should allow the battery to fully run out of power before the unit can restart successfully then simply ensure that your device is recharged, then turn it back on. If you’re a Zune Pass subscriber, you may need to sync your device with your PC to refresh the rights to the subscription content you have downloaded to your device."

So it was more of a hiccup that got blown out of proportion... put that iPod back on the shelf!

Here's a link to the thread on the support forum: http://forums.zune.net/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=408989

Tech Tuesday: D+Caf

2008-12-30T10:03:00.000-08:00

Wow! Not all "advances" in technology are as impressive as the LHC, but this may come close.

Essentially a test strip for your beverage to "detect the decaf scamsters". You simply place this strip in the questionable beverage and it uses the same immunoassay technology of pregnancy tests to determine if the concentraction of caffine exceeds 20mg (in a 6 oz. serving).

I don't know where these people have been getting their coffee? I haven't really seen any news regarding scores of people dying from drinking caffinated coffee or evil corporations making money hand-over-fist by selling the leaded version verses decaf (especially since decaffination is an added process that removes the naturally occuring caffine in coffee/cocoa beans and is therefore more costly).

I understand that there are people with caffine sensitivities and others with moral/religious convictions preventing them from drinking the legal stimulant, but is there really enough of a market for these things?

On a side note, speaking of pregnancy tests, I wonder if I ingest enough caffine in the day for one of these strips to come up positive? Hmmmm...

If you're interested in purchasing a 20 pk. of these babies here's the link:
http://www.medgadget.com/archives/2008/12/how_to_detect_the_decaf_scamsters.html

Source: Gizmodo via Discover Testing via MIT Technology Review via Medgadget

Meet my nemesis at work

2008-12-29T13:34:00.000-08:00

I'd like to introduce you to my nemesis.

"It looks like a chair" you may say. Not true. It's a torture device that tests ones resolve and patience disguised as a chair.

First of all, when I sit down on it, the "lean back" lever kicks out and basically throws the chair forward almost knocking me on to the ground.

"Why don't you just sit down more carefully?" Because I shouldn't have to think just to sit down! Secondly, the "lean back" lever likes to randomly pop out, usually choosing the moments when I have a mug of hot coffee at my lips.

"There are probably a ton of other chairs, why don't you switch?" The chairs in the office are kind of a mishmash and are not all the same, so if I take another person's chair, they'll know. The extra chairs have terrible lumbar support (wow, I sound old).

So I basically have to make the choice to either have a sore back or look like an idiot. I have way more experience with the latter.

Baking: Take the good with the bad

2008-12-29T10:36:00.000-08:00

My wife has found a new love for baking. This holiday, batch after batch of delicious treats and confections have rolled off the stove and out of the oven. My tough job is that someone has to "test" them and verify that they are of "gift-giving quality".

Unfortunately for me, I am responsible for keeping the kitchen clean (since we both work full-time, and I admit I slack sometimes). So I present to you:

One of the many reasons I love when my wife bakes (the picture doesn't do them justice!):

And the only reason I hate when my wife bakes (not really though):

Santa's Landing Strip

2008-12-29T10:12:00.000-08:00

Despite how dirty the title sounds, this is a clean post. :) This is one of the things I really look forward to during the pandemonium that is the Holidays. Its hard to tell from the picture, but the little white lights are luminaries. There is a neighborhood between our house and my parents' that line all of their streets with these luminaries. It is one of the coolest things, and its even better when there is the classic Fresno fog. There is just something surreal about the soft glow in the chilly, damp air. I did some rough math and I estimate there is at least 6,000 little lights guiding Santa to people's homes to drop off his "wares".

Winning Wednesday: SSF2THDR

2008-12-24T09:12:00.000-08:00

Ahhh... this game brings me back. Super Street Fighter II Turbo HD Remix is exactly what it says, a remake of the old Street Fighter II with updated graphics and "more balanced" characters (exempt Cammy who now apparently has super powers). It features the original eight characters, the four boss characters, and the four added characters from Super Street Fighter II. The added online play is a nice addition and seems to work flawlessly. It is sometimes hard to find a "quick match", but if you host a match it usually takes only a few seconds to find an opponent. On the downside its not possible to just invite a friend and play them directly. You can get around this by hosting a player match and then inviting them. You'll end up playing with strangers also, but you actually get to watch the fight of the people who are playing. The biggest draw back is not the games fault, but the crappy US Xbox controller's D-Pad. Once you get used to it the game is definitely worth the points. Available for 1200 MSP ($15) on Xbox LIVE arcade.

Low Tech Tuesday: Amish Paradise

2008-12-23T21:00:00.000-08:00

I got a call today from my wife alerting me that she "broke our house". What she meant by this was that the power had shut off again (not really her fault) but this time it wouldn't come back on. We'd been having some trouble with one of the circuits in our home for the last few weeks, flickering lights, breaker constantly popping, etc. Normally the quick fix for this is to go to the breaker and switch all of the 15 amp breaker switches off and then. We end up having to do all of the plug breaker switches because the wiring in our house is RI-DIC-ULOUS, as it seems the builder/contractor decided to play a game called "confuse the electrician". I know it confuses electricians because my grandpa came over (a Master electrician) and he we looked for the problem for about four hours and the prognosis came up "inconclusive". So at this point we have no Kitchen lights (the stove, refrigerator, and other appliances including the coffee maker, still work) and several plugs are out (one in our playroom, two in our dining area, and four in our bedroom).

The real gem was getting to explore my attic space again. Notice I say attic space and not attic, there is a big difference. An attic is a place that usually has a floor and you are able to stand up and store stuff in. Our attic space is basically what I imagine hell to be like. In the very center of the space there is about four feet of clearance (I am 6'1" tall), and the clearance decreases with the slope of the roof. Boy! That sounds like it sucks... yeah well it gets better, the ceiling/backside of the roof has staples sticking about and inch and a half out everywhere just waiting for you to impale yourself when you forget there is a low ceiling. The "floor" is really just the drywall for the actual ceiling below you (which cannot support the weight of an adult male). There are piles and piles of fiberglass (what itching powder is made of) insulation with 20+ years of dust caked on. The wiring up there is pulled so tight that I was scared I'd pull something out while wiggling around, and to take up even more space there are heating ducts everywhere. Oh and spiderwebs... lots of spiderwebs.

So to recap, I was squirming around with spiders and itchy fiberglass up to my neck, gasping for breath between huge clouds of possibly toxic dust, all the while simultaneously trying not to stab my head or fall through the floor below as I shimmy and shake over ducts, pipes, and wires. Good times. I felt like Indiana Jones and was basically waiting for this guy to pop up underneath a pad of insulation:

And the best part. Round 2 tomorrow.

Wow! This blog is so popular that...

2008-12-18T11:12:00.000-08:00

...Target has begun to market for Tepid Coffee. Okay so not really, but a week ago or so when I was in Target I saw this "Commuter Mug" in the "oh crap I don't know what to get section". You know the section that has all of the random gifts and gadgets in the solid red boxes. Well for ten bucks you can pick up this mug that plugs into your car's accessory outlet (formerly known as a cigarette lighter) and it will keep your beverage at one of three tempertures: Hot, Warm, or Tepid. Honestly though, who wants their coffee tepid? I just get busy working and forget its there so it ends up becoming lukewarm. No word yet on the accompanying "Stale Muffin paper bag" though.

Winning Wednesday: The Target Demographic

2008-12-17T10:26:00.001-08:00

Last Friday night we had one of my wife's former co-workers, Bekah, and her husband Wayne over for some dinner and gaming. As we got to talking I found out that Wayne and I had a lot in common (almost to an eerie degree). During our conversation I found out he does a weekly podcast with some friends called The Target Demographic. The subject matter runs the gamut from movies to music to gaming all from the perspective of those in their respective medium's target demographic (males ages 25-34). I subscribed and had a listen. I have to say its quite entertaining and I really appreciate the lack of BS fluff (as$ kissing, "advertisement interviews", etc) that fills some of the studio's and developer's podcasts. You should check it out if you have an opportunity, heck even if you don't have an opportunity you should check it out.

The Target Demographic Website

The Target Demographic Show #39 (latest show as of this post)

Tech Tuesday: Windows Mobile Apps

2008-12-16T10:19:00.000-08:00

These days often I hear of the many cool things the iPhone can do and I have to admit its a pretty cool phone. However, other than a far superior UI (user interface), I haven't really heard of anything it can do functionally that my Windows Mobile phone can't. I am currently using the HTC Kaiser (aka AT&T Tilt) running Windows Mobile 6.1 Professional. The Tilt is what is refered to as a Pocket PC meaning that it has a touch screen, I will let you know if the Smartphone (non-touchscreen) equivalent is also available.

I wanted to share with you a few of the additional applications I use on a daily basis (the total of which cost me $0.00), not including basic things like calculator or text messaging. One major thing to note is that I subscribe to an unlimited data plan and some of these applications are data intensive (meaning if you don't have an unlimited plan it could cost you a bit in data fees).

One of my all time favorite apps just got better. Google Mobile Maps (available for several platforms including Blackberry and Symbian 60 (Nokia Smartphones)) now offers "Street view" along with its typical map view, satellite view and turn-by-turn directions. GMM also works with my phones built in GPS (also works with an external GPS reciever), or (if you don't have GPS) it can use network towers to approximate your position.

Next up, I use a program called iContact (yes I know it has the stupid "i"). Its an application that runs on top of the normal contacts application but is much more finger friendly. Also you can quickly go directly to contacts starting with a certain letter with the alphabet pad and it supports "favorites" so you can quickly access people you call often.
*There is no smartphone version of this app

Since I'm not always at my computer I also like to keep up with the blogs and podcasts I follow with an application called BeyondPod. Its a nice little RSS reader that will automatically download the latest feeds from the sites you choose. One of the big advantages of this app is it will also download the lastest podcasts OTA (over the air) right to the phone, without the 10MB limit like some "other phones" have to deal with. (Smartphone Version)

Another app I really like is called PockeTwit. It is basically a Twitter client that lets me update my status on twitter/facebook, and receive friends' updates. One nice feature is that it uses a unique notification (like when you get a text message) that works outside of the program itself. (Smartphone version/Additional download site for Pocket PC)

Live Search is an application from Microsoft itself that has maps, traffic, and directions also (I use GMM for that), but I do use it as a quick way to pull up the cheapest gas prices in town and movie showtimes. Another cool feature is the voice search. You press a button and say what and where you want to find something and it will pull up a list that matches, for example "Starbucks in Fresno California". (Works for both Pocket PC and Smartphone)

One of the major areas of improvement for Windows Mobile is its crappy browser (Internet Explorer Mobile, not good on the PC not good on a phone). This is where Opera comes in! A great browser that surfs the entire internet, not just the mobile net. Has a great zoom feature and supports flash and java content. Which is funny since Microsoft's Xbox.com and social.zune.net both require java to login and are therefore inaccessible through IE. If you download one app for your phone I would say do this one! (I am currently using Opera Mobile 9.5 Beta 2, but only the last stable version (8.65) is available for smartphones.)

So that's a sample of what I use on a daily basis. If there's something in particular you are looking for let me know. A great site to find all sorts of applications (all free) is freewarepocketpc.net for Pocket PCs or smartphone-freeware.com for WM smartphones. Hope this helps!

Maybe you can reward us with some floppy disks too!

2008-12-15T12:51:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, my wife applied for a Buy.com Visa to get a pretty sizable discount on my Christmas gift (with the intention of just paying it off immediately). The other day it came in the mail along with the standard disclosures and pamphlets. I took a look at the "Directory of Benefits and Services" and a few things caught my eye. Now I love buy.com because they have some really amazing deals on some cool products, but I think they need to update their marketing "collateral". This is picture of the inside flap of the brochure showing what kind of cool products you can "find" on buy.com:

There were two lines that stuck out like sore thumbs. First: "Hollywood Blockbusters on VHS and DVD"

VHS?!?!? Seriously in 2008?

The second (mind you we got this in the mail in December of 2008): "The Hottest PC and Console Games including Playstation, Dreamcast, and Nintendo64".

Um... The Sega Dreamcast was discontinued in March of 2001 and Sega no longer even makes consoles! And the Playstation and Nintendo64? Sony and Nintendo have released TWO generations of console since those were on the market (Playstaton 2 and Playstation 3/Nintendo Gamecube and Nintendo Wii).

I'm surprised the new Milli Vannilli "record" wasn't available.

Long's Cash Cow

2008-12-12T10:29:00.000-08:00

My son has been a little under the weather with a cold these past couple of days. The other night we ran out of cold medicine and so I made a trip to the Long's Drug Store across the street to pick some up. I perused the cold and allergy aisle, and to my dismay they were out of children's decongestant. I grabbed my phone to let my wife know (she had already made an attempt at Target, where they were out too), and was apparently very focused. As I was putting the phone to my ear a man shouted at me four inches away from my head scaring the bejesus out of me. My heart was literally pounding. I turn to look at who this a-hole yelling at me is, and I am greeted by the evincii PharmAssist machine (I believe evincii is Italian for evil).

Now here is where I think the conspiracy is. This particular Long's is frequented by an "older" clientele, and this machine is conveniently located within close proximity to both the Adult diapers and heart medicine. So this little machine on the back of the end cap quietly sits until some unsuspecting victim turns the corner and then it blasts information at you causing you to either poop yourself or have a heart attack. Coincidence? I think not.

ACCUweather huh?

2008-12-11T12:54:00.001-08:00

The weather in Fresno is a bit screwy, especially in the wintertime. Some days its really cold (relatively) and others you have to layer your clothes so you can peel them off during the day (usually ending in a T-shirt). My phone has a handy little feature that allows me to quickly check the current conditions, and daily highs and lows with data provided by accuweather. So I make it a habit to check the weather on my phone as I'm getting dressed in the morning so I can choose the correct ensemble. This morning I picked up my phone and hit the weather button and was greeted with this:

What the hell? Its snowing right now?!?!? Um... as much as I like the novelty of it snowing in Fresno (it only happens like once every 10 years), I've never heard of it snowing when its 38 degrees outside. I'm no meterologist, but I'm pretty sure you need freezing conditions (<32 degrees) in order to have snow. I shrugged it off and went about my business. Later as I stepped outside, this is what I saw:

Typical Fresno winter fog. This is what I get for trusting a weather service based 3,000 miles away in State College, PA. Should have watched the local weather forecast. (Anyone catch the irony here? Look at who provides their data.)

Analogy of the day

2008-12-10T13:24:00.000-08:00

Earlier in the day when I left my desk to take a quick pee pee break, I entered the restroom and found that the only urinal was in use and I had to use the toilet. It made me stop to do a little introspection: why was I disappointed by this? The same job gets done no matter what kind of receptacle is used, and in the case of men (and some women) a porcelain box isn't even required. Then it came to me in the form of an analogy.

Urinal:Toilet = Chopsticks:Forks
(urinal is to toilet as chopsticks are to forks)

Let me explain. At home I have a toilet, this is what I use on a daily basis. There is a certain novelty to urinals. Its similar to going out to a Chinese restaurant for dinner. You could use a fork to eat your chow mein, but you still ask for the chopsticks. 'Nuff said.

Oops! Wrong link!

2008-12-09T14:10:00.001-08:00

I just realized that on my Holiday recap post I posted the wrong link for Holly Jones' photography website. This is the correct link www.hollyjonesphotography.com. If you haven't, take the time to check out her site. She does amazing work (like the fine specimen above). Sorry Holly.

photo by Holly Jones.

Confession of a Cheating Heart

2008-12-08T05:07:00.000-08:00

My Sweet White Chocolate Raspberry International Delight,

I am sorry, but I must end our torrid affair. I've run our situation through my head time and time again. I thought I wanted more, but now I realize I was wrong. French Vanilla Coffee Mate and I were having some problems and then you came along. I was weak and partook of your raspberry goodness, but nothing will ever be as good as the vanilla I know and love. I apologize, but this is how it must be.

-Brandon

A walk in the mist

2008-12-03T07:56:00.000-08:00

Its sort of a tradition for us to walk down Christmas Tree Lane every year. For those of you who don't know what Christmas Tree Lane is, its about two miles of decorated houses in an affluent neighborhood. Most of the season (December 1-24) they turn it into a one-way street and you drive down it (slowly), enjoying everyone's decorations. They even used to broadcast Christmas music into your radio (like the old movie drive-ins did with the audio). I haven't driven down it since I was little. Nowadays most cars come with daytime running lights and about 1% of people know how to manually override them, so you end up being blinded from behind, all the while asphyxiating on the exhaust of the cars in front of you. Not really what I'd call a fun time.

Two times a season they close the street off and allow only pedestrians. Most years this involves a clusterf**k of people, rambling the street, bumping into everything that moves. And the decorations had slowly been becoming less and less spectacular. I had even begun to dread the tradition the last couple of years.

But something happened this year. I was genuinely excited about the walk this year since Keegan was now old enough to enjoy all the lights. We avoided the usual hour long wait for a drink at the Starbucks closest to the event, instead opting for "extra hot" beverages at the one closest to our house. Then we avoided the frustration of trying to find a parking spot by meeting our friend's at their parent's house (right by the event). There were still a TON of people, but instead of the zombie like stupor everyone normally was in, everyone "respected the double yellow" (meaning people going north stayed on one side of the road, people going south stayed on the other). We met up with some friends who we don't get to see often enough and enjoyed a walk on the brisk, misty, evening. And to top off the experience, it seems that the lights, sound system, and decorations had been improved since last year. I had a great time!

Cereals of the future

2008-12-02T11:00:00.000-08:00

The other day as I poured myself a bowl of Marshmallow Mateys (a pirate themed generic knockoff of Lucky Charms), I snickered to myself. Its strange how some of history's most notorious villains are now plopped into everyday life as children's mascots of sort. A few centuries ago pirates were feared for raping, killing, stealing, etc, and their eastern equivalent, ninjas, were a group of secretive assassins. Yet today they are cartoon characters and even heroes in some cases. Don't get me wrong I still think ninjas and pirates are cool, but it makes me think: what will the children of 2200 eat for breakfast? Nazi Nuggets? Facist Flakes? Klan Krisp?

I guess only time will tell.

A lesson about homonyms

2008-12-01T09:00:00.000-08:00

If you know me or have read any of my posts you probably think I say some pretty cheesy things. Well now I have proof that I not only say cheesy things, I also think cheesy things. So I present you with my lesson of homonyms:

That's right: I was paring a pair of pears!

The sad thing is, as I was preparing some lunch for the little one and peeling the pear I actually went back to the fridge to to get a second pear just to take this picture. I know: LAME!

Holiday recap

2008-11-30T13:10:00.002-08:00

This year was nicer/crappier than last as far was the four-day weekend. On one hand we had Thanksgiving at our house and everyone came to us so we didn't have to travel to four-baghillon different places this year. Natali organized the evening and it went swimmingly, good food (cookies and desserts for days), minimal family annoyance, all around good time. Not to say it was not without drama, a family incident here, forgetting the cranberry sauce there, etc... The latter was a BIG deal. I cannot eat turkey without cranberry sauce on it (if you haven't tried it I don't want to hear anything).

But just as every year, the peace and fellowship of Thanksgiving gives way to... bum... bum... bummmmm... Black Friday. This year being in the middle of a recession, meaning both: people have less money to spend for the holidays and stores are needing as much business as possible, made it a deadly combination (literally). But we thought we'd give it a shot anyway since it is becomming a bit of a tradition and its nice to have all of your shopping done a month in advance (so I can procrastinate wrapping for 30 days as opposed to one).

The short version of the story is drove around from store to store finding very few good deals, went home found great deals online and realized I could have slept in. sigh.

We also had Holly of HollyJones fame come by and take family photos yesterday. It was probably a little more than she bargained for, but we really appreciate her patience and are very excited to see how they turned out!

As far as today... TBD :). Hope everyone else's weekends went well. How about you? What did you do for the infamous Black Friday?

Ghost in the Machine

2008-11-26T08:50:00.000-08:00

Our garage door opener recently went kaput, so we picked up another one and opted for the professional installation. Aside from a shipping hiccup, the installation went smoothly. Once we got our new opener (which is ninja quiet), things started acting up.
The new opener does a lot of cool things like the standard opens up if the beam is crossed, turns the light on if the beam is crossed, has a thermometer on the control button, has battery backup (in case the power goes out), etc... The only problem is that the signals for the opener to communicate with its various parts is on the same frequency as several other appliances at our house. Here is a list of what else has been affected by our new opener.

Downstairs TV - Randomly switches to the satalite input while playing Xbox (annoying!)
Downstairs light - turns on the light in the middle of the night
Standalone heaters - cranks up the heat, causing us to check on the baby's room often (went in there the other day and it was 84!!!)
Upstairs TV - randomly turns off
Xbox 360 * - Save file for Call of Duty disappeared (don't know if this was just a coincidence)

It was annoying enough that our heaters and TV were on the same frequency (when you turned the volume up or down the heater would go up a degree every time you pushed the button), now we have to deal with the other anomalies. As soon as it starts unlocking doors or vomit split pea soup we're taking it back!

Help Wanted: Game ideas

2008-11-25T11:20:00.000-08:00

So last week when the new Xbox 360 UI debuted, a feature I forgot to mention also debuted: XNA Community Games. These are games created by smaller developers (from teams of 2 - 20 people) with tools available from Microsoft, and sold on the Xbox marketplace. One of my dreams has been to take my passion for video games and translate that into a game I helped create. I've been taking some time (about the past 6 months) learning C# and the XNA framework, and have a pretty good understanding of how to code (program) games now. My brother is really good at Adobe products and has also been learning 3Ds Max (a 3d modeling program) and other graphic programs to do art/assets for the game. Our only problem, and this is where you can help, is we need an idea for the game.

What would you like to see in a game? What did you really like about some of the games you played? Any ideas would be appreciated and of course credit would be given. :)

Dad Moment: 10 things I've learned

2008-11-24T07:56:00.000-08:00

Keegan turned 18 months old last Saturday, and I thought I'd take a moment to reflect on the past year and a half. A lot has happened in the time the little guy came into the world, new house, illness, learning, etc...
Here is a quickly compiled list of ten things I've learned as a dad for in from my son.

10. Do not be deceived by newborn poo
For months before K was born (pretty much as soon as Nat got pregnant), people teased me about poopy diapers. I wasn't ever too worried about it. When K was first born he had the typical meconium (tar poo) which was completely odorless, I knew this would pass in a couple of days. When his first real number twos came they were completely tolerable. No bad smell, and easy to clean up (once you get over the fact that you are getting crap all over your hands). Here is where my warning comes in. This does not last!!! As soon as K moved on to solids the smells moved in. Sometimes I wonder how a boy so small could make a smell that could gag an ox! Potty training here we come.

9. Their brains never turn off
It amazes me how when you just sit back and watch, you can almost see the gears turning in their heads. Eyes constantly moving, hands always feeling things, switching switches, pushing buttons, dropping things just to watch what happens. I only hope this kind of curiosity continues (at least until I find my cell phone in the toilet).

8. Nap time is fleeting
Routine is a integral part of parenting, but don't get too comfortable. When K was first born he slept all day. As he grew a little older he would take two nice long naps, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. This consolidated to one 2-3 hour nap around noon. Now that nap has moved to around 2:00 and only lasts 1-2 hours. *sigh*

7. Baby Einstein is both educational and magical
I don't know what the people a Disney do to these DVDs. But no matter how upset K is, putting on a Baby Einstein DVD is enough to calm his nerves and put him in sort of a trance. My wife uses this trick to get ready in the morning in an attempt to avoid the Q-tip tornado.

6. When you are a baby talking funny is cute
The same things that get you shoved in a locker in high school are adorable when you are two and a half feet tall (NOTE: not sure if this is true of adult little people). Also, you can get away with saying curse words or crass euphemisms. For example, calling sticks "dicks".

5. No matter how many "cool" toys you buy, its the simple things
Keegan has a ton of toys that we (Nat and I) think are cool and end up purchasing because
a) its something we wanted as a kid
b) its something we think we would have wanted as a kid
c) its something we want to play with as an adult
d) K played with it the entire time at the store

D usually ends up in Keegan forgetting about it 12 seconds after he gets home. A and B work out for a little while (a few weeks usually) and C, we end up playing with the toy more.

Yesterday, I was playing with K in the playroom and out of nowhere in the middle of making a block tower he asks for his stick. So we spent the next fifteen minutes looking for his stick (Me: "Keegan where's your stick?", Keegan: "Doah Know"). The rest of the afternoon (until Nap time, err Nap attempt) I watched him hit whiffle balls around the room with his stick (which was the cardboard tube from a wire hanger).

4. Food preferences change
The quickest way to make a toddler not like something is to buy a lot of it.

3. They expect you to know what their gibberish means
My advice, if you don't understand what they're saying, fake it. I've read it teaches them how to hold a conversation (taking turns talking) and if you don't you are likely to have a frustrated little one on your hands.

2. They'll imitate anything they see you do/say
For the most part this isn't a problem and it's neat to see how quickly they learn. The first time Keegan picked up a toothbrush and started "brushing" his own teeth was hilarious. But Be Careful! One slip up and your toddler will likely recite your choice words at the most inopportune time.

1. The conundrum of growing up
On one hand you want them to get just a little bigger so you can do this or that, but they'll never be the same age again. This hit my wife and I the first time we cleaned out his dresser. We wanted him to get just a little bigger so he could tell us what was wrong, or when he was hungry, but as we took out the clothes that were too small for him we realized he'll never wear this again. Enjoy them at the age they are right now. They'll grow up eventually, so don't miss the moments you have now.

Classic battle of good and evil

2008-11-18T08:02:00.000-08:00

Natali, who is super mom/wife/worker, baked some cookies the other night. Not just any cookies, evil demon cookies who possess your thoughts and lure you into eating them. Butterscotch Gingerbread cookies... mmmmmm...

If you can't tell they're really good. So this morning I'm getting ready to leave for work, I've been notoriously bad about eating breakfast (I know, "the most important meal of the day"), but I've tried to be better about it. Even when I don't have time to make a full "balanced breakfast", I'll still try to grab some toast with peanut butter and a banana or something similar. Well this morning I go to grab an apple and come upon this veritable fork in the road:

That's right: fruit on the left... demon cookies on the right. I felt as if tempted by the snake himself. I think we all know who won that battle (I told you they were evil).

Hold on I'm gonna run back home and grab another...

Tech tuesday: NXE (Xbox Update) a day early!!!

2008-11-18T07:44:00.000-08:00

A few weeks back the director of programing for Xbox LIVE, Major Nelson, announced a preview program of the upcoming "New Xbox Experience" which is the new UI with added features for the Xbox 360. There was quite an interest and the application process was completely filled within a few hours. A hand selected group of people, based on their geographic location, ISP, and router make and model, were added to the preview program, which allowed them to download the update early and check it out. I was not selected.

Then about a week later the a "second wave" was announced, this time from the same pool of people, but randomly selected. I was not selected.

Last Thursday an unexpected third wave was announced. My brother, and my friend were both selected. I was not. (The thing that was most disappointing was that I told my friend about the program, and actually filled out my brother's form).
I had pretty much given up on getting it early since it is released worldwide Novemeber 19th (tomorrow).

Last night some friends were over for dinner and I wanted to show my buddy the new Call of Duty game (Call of Duty: World at War). As I signed in I was greeted with a notification of a system update. Confused, I checked my phone (I subscribe to Major Nelson's twitter), and lo and behold there was a tweet indicating that even though it was only a day and a half early everyone who successfully applied to the preview program was now getting the update. Yea!

Other than the UI being updated there are a some cool features added to the 360 now. Here's a list of my favorites:

Ripping games to your Xbox Hard Drive (quicker load times, and quieter play since the disc drive doesn't have to spin)
Streaming Netflix movies through the Xbox (all of the Netflix "instant queue" is available to view on the TV instead of the little computer screen)
Avatars (á la Mii for the Wii, but better looking)

Here's the new dashboard (kinda like the Xbox homepage):

And here's my avatar (what do you think?)

Um...this better be a misprint!

2008-11-13T07:43:00.001-08:00

We bought a "pre-owned" home a year ago and part of the fun is fixing it up the way we want it. So in the spirit of home improvement we applied for a Home Depot card because of the special financing offers (12 months no interest, etc). This morning I got an email reminding me that our payment was due, so I jumped on to make a quick payment. Last month one of our financing offers ended and I wanted to ensure that the it was paid off so we didn't get charged all the accured interest. I opened the statement up (which I hardly ever do) and checked to make sure that everything was right. Then my eyes came across a box with the summary of the accounts APR (annual percentage rate)... this is what I saw:

If you can't see it, this is what it says:

ANNUAL PERCENTAGE RATE on this account: 251.59%

Yeah, just in case you aren't familiar with credit card interest rates 21% is considered really high. I'm assuming this is because we have differed interest due to the promotions, but it was still enough to freak me out for a second.

Tech Tuesday: Crazy gift cards

2008-11-11T09:07:00.000-08:00

Those of you out there who like to buy gift cards as holiday gifts to either A) take the safe route or B) are too lazy to decide, are in luck this year. Now your gift card can not only give your loved one some extra cash to spend as they please, but can also double as a gift itself. So far two of the big box stores have decided to reward their gift-card-giving-patrons by adding some cool little gadgets to them. Best Buy will be offering gift cards that double as a mini speaker (comes included with a 3.5 mm [regular headphone] jack). But Target tops that. They will be offering gift cards that have an included 1.2 MP camera (comes with a USB cord, and a certificate for 40 free prints) at no additional charge. The only catch is you have to buy the two AAA batteries and the minimum denomination for the camera card is $50. Still if you were going to give a $50 card anyway, not bad at all. Well played... well played.

Sources:
http://gizmodo.com/5083112/best-buys-gift-card-is-a-tiny-audio-speaker
http://gizmodo.com/5082383/target-gift-cards-double-as-digital-cameras

If all dogs go to heaven... its okay then right?

2008-11-11T07:36:00.000-08:00

So I've been out of the blogosphere again lately (I'll write a post soon explaining why), mostly because my kiddo has been sick. As a result of his illness, there have been many nights that either myself, my wife, or both of us have been up tending to our feverish, oozing, child. After three and a half weeks of his ailment, we were glad that he was feeling better (and not waking up in the middle of the night covered in poo), and we excited at the prospect of a full night's rest. We were so tired both my wife and I nodded off a couple of times during Heroes last night, so you know we were tired! We went to bed at a modest time, around 11:30 and gently drifted off to slumberville. Not 20 minutes go by and we hear this subdued whining. Like trained dogs, both my wife and I pop off of our pillows and she goes to check on the kiddo to make sure he's not sick again (it kept coming and going). She comes back a few seconds later and tells me K's asleep still. Then WTF is that sound? Turns out it was our neighbor's dog. We've had problems in the past with the dog being let out in the middle of the night, presumably to do her business, and then barking to be let back in (at 4 am!), but at the time we had Zoe who was equally annoying and were hesitant to say anything for fear of looking like hypocrites. Well Zoe is gone now and this crap went on ALL NIGHT!!!!! Like clockwork every 20 minutes there was whining, loud sniffing, and what sounded like the dog trying to break down the door to get in. Needless to say neither of us got any rest last night and we now officially hate that dog. Eff the SPCA!!! That bitch is going down!

I'm off to light a bag of dog doo doo and put it on their doorstep.

One...Two...Three...CRUNCH

2008-11-06T14:54:00.000-08:00

I finally did it! I made it all the way to the middle of a Tootsie Roll Pop! I have a habit (much to my co-workers' dismay) of immediately biting suckers as soon as they touch my mouth and crunching away. But today through sheer determination and will... I made it. Unfortunately it was a bit anticlimatic since al I was left with was the boring faux chocolate center. :(

Follow up: Exotic?

2008-10-25T17:59:00.001-07:00

In case you were dying to know. These are the Hollister exotic.

Exotic?

2008-10-23T11:26:00.000-07:00

I came across this "pumpkin patch" on my way to work the other day, and finally snagged a photo of it. Two things struck me about this particular location.

First of all, the use of the term pumpkin patch. Last year our family went to a pumpkin patch to pick out K's first pumpkin. It involved getting into the car and driving 15 minutes into the rural outskirts of town. Arriving at a family's farm and picking out pumpkins that were in a field, on the vine. I hardly consider throwing down some straw on an asphalt parking lot a pumkin patch.

Second, the inclusion of this sign:

If you were driving by and saw this sign out of the corner of your eye, you might think the "Premium Exotic Pumpkins" were from Hondurus, Hong Kong, maybe even Holland. Nope, the full sign reads: "Premium Exotic Pumpkins from Hollister"... WTF?

Hollister is two hours west of Fresno. What's so exotic about that?!?!?!?

(BTW, I looked up exotic thinking I may have misunderstood its actual meaning... nope, the sign is just full of sh*t).

Return of the TWO!!!

2008-10-23T09:44:00.000-07:00

Just when it had given up hope of ever being set free from the bottom of its box, the flap opens...

from above, as if by the hand of God himself, the imaciated and weary digit is plucked from its grave. Then lifted upon high to oversee and beckon all that see it. The two has returned.

At least for now. Unfortunately I didn't need gas today and by the time I do (in the next two or three days) I'm sure the price will jump up to over $3.50 again, c'est la vie.

Winning Wednesday: Fable II (Late)

2008-10-23T09:27:00.001-07:00

Fable II hasn't really been given great reviews because of its story, but instead its choice and consequence system. Basically you are given free reign to do anything in the game. Each decision you make effects everything else in the game. In the very beginning of the game you begin as a child and are asked to help find some [arrest] warrents for a town guard. After collection them, you are approached by a theif, who says he'll pay you to give him the warrents instead of the guard. The decision seems small, but it has lasting ramifications. Once you grow up and return to the same town, you learn the consequences of your decision. If you gave the warrents to the guard, the town is a bustling center of business with many new shops. If you gave the warrents to the thief, the town is a desolate, lawless, dark place. Each decision you make also effects your good/evil meter, pure/corrupt, and beautify/ugly meters, and the townsfolk react to you differantly depending on your "ratings". Its an interesting game, and I'm only about a third of the way through it, but I am continually impressed by the depth of the good vs evil system. On top off all that the visuals are amazing beautiful scenery and very detailed environments. I'd definately advise picking this one up even if you don't like RPGs.

Swing by the Xbox website and check out the minigame. Its a little violent, but the animation style is worth watching in itself (A Hero's Tale).

NOTE: When asked to put your birthday in, the format is DD MM YYYY, not MM DD YYYY.

Tepid Coffee and Stale Blogs

2008-10-20T09:14:00.000-07:00

I realize I've been out of the blogosphere for a few days now, but unfortunately I don't have anything clever to say this morning either (well I do, but I don't have the pictures to go with it), so instead I'll give you the Reader's Digest version of what happened in the 10 days since my last post.

My sunglasses went "missing" from a party for my Grandparents 50th anniversary (#1 suspect is my uncle)
New sunglasses purchased for a ridiculous amount of money (*sigh*)
Got an offer for a new job (back in engineering, w00t!), start next Monday.
Pre-ordered Fable II (comes in tomorrow).
Went and saw game five of the NLCS and watched my Dodgers get walloped. :(
My little guy got a high fever and didn't feel well most of the weekend.
Went to a wedding with an open bar and fully utilized it.
Had our family (and then some) over for dinner last night and watched game seven of the ALCS.

That's it for now. I'll be back with something worth reading soon. Thanks for checking in!

Did you know...

2008-10-10T20:44:00.000-07:00

...the dollar sign ($) had never been used on any US currency until 2007?

sorry for the wikipedia reference.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dollar_sign

Spare me your marketing drabble

2008-10-09T14:24:00.000-07:00

While I was at "Club Save Mart" (where I spotted the XXX soda aisle), I also saw a sign for their pharmacy's "19-Minute" Guarantee". While its nice they make a promise like that, they are one of the newest entries into what I call "arbitrary number marketing". Following Circuit City's 24/24 guarantee (pick up ready in 24 minutes or you get a $24 gift card) and the countless rows and rows of retail products ($xx.99) Save Mart steps up the psychological assault. I have absolutely no problem with service speed guarantees, in fact I am apt to go some place that has one versus one that doesn't. The problem I have is the stupid time-frame. Why 19 minutes? Do they really think people are going to go shopping for their groceries and then drive across the street to Long's to pick up their prescription? It would take longer than a minute just to get across the street!

My list of approved time related guarantees:

60 seconds (1 minute is also an acceptable denotation)
3 minutes
5 minutes
10 minutes
15 minutes
20 minutes
30 minutes
1 hour (60 minutes is not acceptable in this case)
2, 3, 6, 12, 18, 24, 36 hour guarantees are also acceptable for longer services
anything that takes longer than a day an a half really shouldn't brag about how "quick" they can get things done

Have you seen any other gimmicky time guarantees?

Tech Tuesday: Instant Art

2008-10-07T12:00:00.000-07:00

Digital picture frames have been out there for a while. If you're unfamiliar, its basically an LCD screen and memory card reader with a frame around it. Its a nice way to display a slide show of pictures in your living room without having to tie up the TV. But most of the time you have to take the memory card out of your camera or plug the frame into your computer via USB to load the pictures. Not really an inconvience, but T-Mobile is soon to release the first GPRS enabled digital picture frame. Basically the Parrot DF7700 branded under the T-Mobile name, you can send a picture message (MMS) to the frame and it automatically downloads the photo and displays it. The price point is on the higher end of the average for normal digital picture frames (~$100 at release), but where TMo is going to try and stick it to you is the $10 per month fee to use the GPRS function. Granted you get a new SIM card and "phone" number for the frame, but I'm not sure its actually worth $120 a year to have that capability. If you like the idea of a digital picture frame, my suggestion is purchase a digital picture frame with Wi-Fi capabilities (assuming you have wireless internet where the frame will be displayed). You can have it sync to your Picasa Web Albums or any other photo hosting site as well as using your memory cards (and the best part is there are no additional subscription fees).

RE:FW:FW:FW: I HATE YOU!!!

2008-10-06T13:19:00.000-07:00

Of the many annoying things that occur in day-to-day office life, the “mass e-mail forward” has to be the worst! At least three times a week I receive an email that is either marginally funny (hardly a snicker, usually an eye roll), a “see who your friends are/you’re wish will be granted/you will be cursed/you will die tomorrow if you don’t forward this”, or a “warning” email. Don’t get me wrong, if you send me a genuinely funny email/video I appreciate it. Problem is the people who send these emails out tend to send them to either “All-Recipients” or a huge list of people. Not content to let the annoyance pass, several people feel the need to reply to these messages a la “reply to all”. So it wasn’t bad enough that “Gang members in Fresno are getting into minor fender benders around town and then carjacking people when they confront them” now I have 20 additional emails that range from “that’s so scary!” to the simple “OMG”.

To compound this, my [personal] mobile phone is set to synchronize with my work’s Microsoft Exchange server (I get my work email on my phone). A few months back my wife had to call AT&T wireless (our provider) to take care of an issue. After her problem was “fixed” the operator told her that my line was well over its allotted text messages (200). That raised a flag. I do text message more than I make phone calls, but I’ve never gone over my 200 messages. I called AT&T back and after several flip-flop answers it was determined that when my email is sent to my phone it counts as a message. Now you may be thinking “Brandon isn’t email part of your data plan?” I thought the same, and questioned this (as I have an unlimited data plan). Turns out, yes indeed syncing with the Exchange server is counted on the data plan, but also counts as text messages (i.e. we get dinged twice!). Blarg!

To make it simple I have devised some rules/guidlines for sending forwards:

If you didn’t shed a tear from laughing or at least literally laughed out loud, don’t forward it
If you are my friend, you know it and don’t need an email back from the friend fairy (or whatever the “blessing du jour” is)
The only wish that will be granted by including me in your “10 people by midnight” is if you wished to get smacked!
As far as curses, see #3
If you think not sending an email will kill you, make sure a psychiatrist is one of the people you forward the message to, but change the subject line to “I need help”
Do not send ANY warning emails without at the minimum checking snopes.com 99% of the time it will be there, and you can thank me for preventing you from looking like a gullible dipsh*t. Also if there is a link to snopes in the email, for GOD SAKE click it and make sure the link refers to the same story!!! (http://www.snopes.com)

This concludes my rant. Now forward this to 10 friends by 5:00 pm or a dingo will eat your baby.

(ETA: Ironically as I type this I just received two more!!!)

This seems a bit counterproductive...

2008-10-02T13:39:00.000-07:00

I saw a sign for this free annual church event. My mother-in-law and a few friends attend this church, and they have explained that the "Trunk or Treat" event is a free event for children, where instead of going unsupervised door-to-door "trick-or-treating", they can do it with the supervision of adults in the church's parking lot. Seems like a pretty good idea until you take a step back.

All year long you tell your kids not to talk to strangers, not to take candy from strangers, not to get near the car of strangers... etc. Now you take them to an event in which the sole purpose is to have your kids go from car to car recieving candy from multiple stranger's trunks... hmmmmm...

(By the way, look at the poor boy's concerned face. I think even he knows something's up.)

As of the post the church's site hasn't been updated with the specifics, but if you're interested here's the link: http://www.npkids.org/

(Its still probably better than letting your 18 month old go by his/herself) :)

Winning Wednesday: Stuff White People Like

2008-10-01T11:31:00.000-07:00

My parents got this book for me for my birthday and I have to say its pretty funny. Its a satire of well... Stuff White People Like, and is writen as a guide for non-white people who want to make white friends. While the target of the parody is the liberal white person, even moderate and conservative people can get a laugh out of it. Consistently while reading the book I either laughed because I was "caught" or snikered to myself because "I knew exactly who he's talking about".

Give it a looksy and I think you'll find it entertaining. Included in the book are also fill-in-the-blank "form letters" to make it easy to bond with a white person and a few quizzes to help determine your "whiteness". The book is written by Christian Lander, and he also has a blog called Stuff White People Like.

Links:

Book on Amazon.com

Book's website

Stuff White People Like Blog

Going into the "adult" section

2008-09-30T21:11:00.001-07:00

Shhhh. Don't tell my wife, but I just came out of the adult soda section at our local supermarket. Now you may be wondering.. WTF is "adult soda"?! Put your dirty mind to rest it isn't fizzy lubricants or soda in multi-purposed shaped bottles. Quite honestly... I don't know. Everything in that aisle looked like plain old pop. Perhaps its to give shoppers that naughty feeling without the store having to invest in red velvet curtains to hide the "products" from the kiddies.

Tech Tuesday: Vat to do...vat to do

2008-09-30T19:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday it became extremely apparent that I am all to dependent on the digital age. Both the Xbox LIVE and the Zune Marketplace servers were down for maintenance. That meant two of the three things I like to do when the kiddo has gone to bed and the wife is busy chatting with friends or reading a book, were unavailable. Despite being warned via email, LIVE message, AND dashboard announcement of the impending hiatus I was caught unprepared. So basically I had to resort to play all alone with no friends and stale music. *sigh*

Thank God Heroes was on last night or I might have withered away.

I'm sorry this post is passing on the boredom I experienced. (I'm not even going to put a picture to whet your imagination.) :)

ETA: Everything is up and running now, except for a small glitch with the Call of Duty 4 matchmaking (which makes playing online IMPOSSIBLE.)

REALLY strong coffee

2008-09-29T09:00:00.000-07:00

Anyone who knows me, knows that I like my coffee pretty strong. If I can see the bottom of the mug, its too light.

A few months back Starbucks switched from brewing coffee every hour to every half hour. Obviously the purpose of the change was to provide fresher brewed coffee. To avoid wasting coffee they switched from brewing "full" batches to "half" batches (but doesn't that make the half batch the full batch now? Sorry, that's neither here nor there). Now that half as much coffee is brewed at a time, they run out quicker. In order to avoid making the customer wait for a new pot, a lot of time they do the ol' "tip the carafe" trick. If given the opportunity to wait for the coffee...take it! Several times I have enjoyed the first 3/4 of my cup when my mouth is suddenly infiltrated with hundrends of coffee grounds. Here is a picture from the last time it happened, the proverbrial "straw".

The thing that sucks the most is if you get your coffee to go, you have no idea this is going to happen until your sitting at your desk and all of a sudden a pile of coffee bean corpses are in your mouth. As I said, I like strong coffee now chewable. Its getting so bad I might start brewing my own coffee at home... nah, that sounds like a lot of work. :)

Oh how they grow...

2008-09-26T14:58:00.000-07:00

I realize that this is a bit of a selfish post and has a very targeted audience (mainly me), but I was going through some old pictures and came across an old photo of Keegan (my son, for those who don't know). It is CRAZY for me to think that this...

is the same little person as this...

Woah!

Did you Know...

2008-09-26T10:20:00.000-07:00

Pac-man was partially inspired by Namco desinger Tohru Iwatani seeing a pizza with a slice misssing? Pac-man's name in North America was originally Puck-man, but was changed just before release (if you're wondering why, think P=F). The Japanese name for pac-man is pakku-man and comes from the Japanese onomatopeic phrase paku-paku-taberu. The paku-paku imitates the sound of the mouth opening and closing (twice, kinda like a smacking sound).

Sources:

http://www.gamespot.com/features/vgs/universal/hist_pacman/p4_01.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pac-Man

Smileys: a leap forward for passive-aggression

2008-09-25T11:52:00.000-07:00

I just had a sort of epiphany... By simply adding a colon and sideways parenthesis (singular for parentheses, file that one under who cares), you can say some truly hurtful things and totally get away with it.

Examples:

You are the stupidest person I know :)
I'm going to kill you!!! :)
Wow! You're 45, don't have a job, and still live with your parents?! That's awesome! :)

I think subconsciously I inherited the use of smiley faces from my mom. She used to leave chore "todo" lists on the fridge and always put a smiley face at the end. Something along the lines of:

"Please do the following:
-Clean the kitchen
-Clean your bathroom
-Dust & Vacuum
Thanks, Mom [smiley]"

But I always interpreted it as this: "I know its summer and you would probably rather be doing something else but instead, do these chores or you'll be sorry! Don't like it? Awwwww, Mom. [middle finger]." (Ahhhhh... teen angst.)

For some pretty funny passive-aggressive notes (many with smileys) check out passiveaggressivenotes.com.

ETA: I just noticed the irony in putting the info about the plurality of parenthesis in parenthesis... I know, I'm lame.

Winning Wednesday: Heroes

2008-09-24T08:55:00.001-07:00

Monday night was the premiere of season three, and it didn't disappoint. If you haven't watched Heroes and don't know what the hype is all about, you don't know what you're missing out on. I was a bit skeptical about the show and only saw one or two episodes in the middle of the first season. I had seen other shows with superhero types a la Smallville and the like, and didn't really enjoy them. Our friends were really into it and I ended up getting season one for Christmas. My wife and I devoured it, watching at least four episodes a night (that's right I said my wife, its not just a "guys show"). As soon as possible we purchased season two and did the same. Heroes manages to keep you on your toes, telling the story of each of the characters and how they are tied together (think Lost, but with superpowers). If you haven't been watching it, I think it might be pretty tough to try and jump in now without any background. Go to Blockbuster or Netflix and rent disc one of season one and I guarantee that by the end of it you'll be hooked.

Heroes is on NBC Monday nights at 9pm and is rebroadcast on G4 Tuesday at 10pm.

LOW Tech Tuesday: Pop Starting a Car

2008-09-23T22:41:00.000-07:00

I was originally going to post about the new T-Mobile G1 (aka the gPhone/HTC Dream) which is the first phone to feature Google's mobile phone OS (operating system) called Android. But I got lazy and didn't feel like compiling all of the information and trying to explain how open source is better for a consumer than closed source software... blah blah blah.

Since I had the "privilage" of engaging in one of my favorite activites tonight after getting some work done at Starbucks, I thought I'd pass it along.

My car's steering column has a bit of give to it which allows for the key to be removed without actually turning it to the "off" position. This is handy when you run into 7-Eleven for a Slurpee when it's 104 outside and don't want to turn the A/C off. Not so handy when you think you've turned the car off and leave the key in the ACC position for two hours with the radio on. This is exactly what happened while I was at Starbucks this evening. Needless to say when I returned to my car the battery was dead. Since this problem isn't new (and I've had a manual transmission for about 90% of my driving years), I knew exactly what to do.

Ideally you'd have another person with you to push the car while you are in the driver's seat, but since the other patrons we're "busy", I'll give you the solo version.

Turn off all of the accessories (radio, lights, dome light, etc)
Put the car in neutral and disengage the parking brake
Place the key in the "on" position (this is an important step I missed tonight)
Get out and push the car until you get it rolling about 3-5 MPH (easier on a slope)
Once the car is moving, jump in the car, depress the clutch and quickly place it in first or second gear
Once in gear, "pop" the clutch by letting it out and then quickly press it back in once the car is started (if you don't press it back in immediately the car will stall)
Optional: Quickly drive off, since you looked like a goofus pushing your car around the parking lot for what now looks like no reason at all

Something to note, is that this only works on a dead battery/starter (and as far as I know only on manual transmissions), if your car makes the rrrr-rrrr-rrrr noise when you try to start it you'll have to call a tow truck.

A side note, tonight was especially fun since in my frustrated, flustered, embarrased state I forgot to turn the key to "on". I ended up pushing the car up and down the parking lot about ten times before I realized this, adding to my frustration/flusteredness/embarresment. *sigh*

You know it's close to payday when...

2008-09-22T09:21:00.000-07:00

...you have more money in your car than in your checking account and this is how you have to buy your morning coffee. :(

Just so you don't think we're irresponsible with money, let me give you a little background. I work for a small company and in order for me to get benefits (which was a requisite for me taking the job) they have me technically "employed" by one of their larger partner companies. The partner company thinks its fun to change the paydays at their whim. I believe their payday calender is based on a combination of the current humidity, the shape of the grounds on the bottom of their coffee cup, and the last "animal" they saw in the clouds, no matter what it is based on it's still a mystery to everyone else.

In all seriousness, paydays are supposed to be on the 5th and 20th. Now, every company I've ever worked for no matter how small paid you on the Friday before the payday if the actual payday fell on the weekend. The first time in the year this occurred, payday fell on a Saturday and we got paid on Friday (nice, that's how I thought it works).

Next time this happened, payday fell on a Sunday, so we got paid on the following Monday. It was explained that Saturday=Friday; Sunday=Monday, the email went on to explain that this was all spelled out in the calendar we received in the HR paperwork (which I didn't get). Well, that sucks, but oh well, at least now I know.

The next time it happened, payday fell on the Saturday of the three day Independence day weekend (the 4th was on a Friday), we got paid on Monday (WTF????).

This time payday fell on a Saturday and we get paid today. Again we got an email explaining this, and it said the following:

Hi Everyone,

Just a reminder payday is on Monday. The calendar's are not right. If payday lands on a weekend anytime payday is alway on the following Monday. If you have any questions please let me know.

Thanks

Accounts Receivable

(copied and pasted from my email (I added the bold, but left the spelling error >:) )

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Next payday is on a Sunday, so we'll see if I actually get paid. >:(

Wanted: your input

2008-09-18T13:04:00.000-07:00

With my recent acquisition of Rock Band 2 and the update to the Zune, I had a bit of a nostalgic flash. Listening to some of the songs on the RB2 soundtrack brought back some fond memories of hanging with friends in high school, spending ridiculous amounts of time at the movie theater, playing Goldeneye 007 on the N64, swimming until we were raisins... ah good times.

But the music... that was the stuff that tied it all together. Whether it was The Verve Pipe's "Freshman" playing on the radio, listening to The Offspring's Ixnay on the Hombre album in my friend's car while bumming a ride home (I got my license after HS) or the "pocket call" I got from my friend Winston as he was singing Blink 182's "What's My Age Again" at the top of his lungs while he was driving, it was all good.

My question to you is: what songs do you remember rocking out to in high school? I want to make a play list of tracks from around 1994 - 2000 (yes I know that's more than 4 years I attended HS from '94/'95 - '98/'99)? Let me know in the comments!

ETA: Here's the updated list. Class of 1999 Track List

Winning Wednesday: Rock Band 2

2008-09-17T09:36:00.001-07:00

My birthday is coming up, but we'll be out of town on a camping trip when the day arrives. Because of this, our friends gave me my birthday present when they came over for dinner on Monday night. Nestled under a bag of brownie mix (I think wrapping paper is for suckas!), was Rock Band 2 for the Xbox 360!

Now the game itself is not that differant from the first Rock Band, but there are a few adjustments that were welcome. First, they have added the ability to play the World Tour as a solo act. A big chunk of the achievements in the first game were aquired in World Tour, but you had to have more than one person playing. This posed a problem since, when we had people over and played, we wanted to just play for the sake of having fun (i.e., pick the songs we were going to play), therefore, I barely have any points from that game.

Next, the ability to have one character play any instruments. If you have ever played the first one, you know that creating a character to represent you is a lot of fun. It just gets annoying when you have to create a new character when you want to go from guitar to drums.

Finally, the track list. WOW! The developers were thoughtful enough to take the time to create the ability to import the on-disc tracks from Rock Band 1 into Rock Band 2. Couple that with the fact that all downloaded songs from the first game also work in the second and the 84 track on-disc track list (<--yes... that is Alanis Morissette) of the second game and you are talking about something for everyone!

Tech Tuesday: Google Desktop

2008-09-16T23:00:00.000-07:00

DISCLAMER: I'm sorry about the grammatical errors and overuse of the word "ton", but I was trying to get this out posthaste (get it...posthaste... *sign*)

Google has a ton of applications that are available to the public for free. Some are pretty well know such as G-Mail, Blogger, Picasa, and Talk. There are also several applications available that are less known.

Google came on the scene as a search engine and they have not forgotten their roots. They have expanded their typical search (that includes webpages, images, videos, News, and shopping) with some very specific searches.

Blog Search - http://www.google.com/blogsearch?hl=en
Book Search - http://www.google.com/blogsearch?hl=en
Patent Search - http://www.google.com/patents?hl=en
Scholar Search - http://scholar.google.com/schhp?hl=en

There are a ton of products, but one of my favorite is Google Desktop. One of the few features I like about Vista is the Sidebar (If you're unfamiliar, don't worry). Google Desktop is a sort of combo application. The first part is that it indexes your entire computer (using the file types that you specify) and makes them instantly searchable through a dynamic search bar. No more having to use the Windows "Find..." command and wait for the little dog to dig up the file you're looking for.

The second part of the application is the Sidebar/Deskbar. It basically is panel full of widgets that docks to the side of your screen. Any widget you can add to your iGoogle homepage can also be added to the sidebar. On mine I have my XBox Gamercard, a clock, the weather, a picasa photo slideshow, scratch pad (notepad for scratching quick notes), RSS Reader, and email.

The search feature alone will save a ton of time, it not only searches filenames, but also the files themselves. So if you remember you wrote a paper in college about Gene Simmons winning the 2012 presidential election but can't remember where you put it, just type in Gene Simmons.

To see more applications available from google go to: http://www.google.com/intl/en/options/

Also check out the Google Labs, which are products that are still being developed, but available to try (http://labs.google.com/)

The US Forest Service wants us to try tabacco?

2008-09-15T09:30:00.000-07:00

I was driving home from work the other day, minding my own business, when in my periphery I noticed a billboard. I ignore probably 95% of billboards, but happened to be stopped at a light in proximity to this one (in the middle of the city at least an hour from a forest/woodland area).

On the bottom right of the white billboard was the left half of the iconic forest fire prevention mascot Smoky Bear. The only other distinguishable thing on the board was a phrase in big bold letters that said: "GET YOUR SMOKEY ON!" Apparently this is the new slogan for the US Forest Service. Now, Smoky has been out of the public spotlight for years, (he kind of went the way of McGruff the crime dog) I honestly can't remember a Smokey PSA since before I was in high school (a decade ago). My point being: no one who knows who Smoky Bear is really says "get your anything on" and any one young enough to use that phrase without seeming like a dofus doesn't know who Smokey is. So who is this PSA geared towards? The most troubling thing to me is that before this sign made it up, there were probably countless hours spent in meetings coming up with "the perfect" slogan. And this is what they came up with???

I'm glad my tax dollars are hard at work.

source: http://www.smokeybear.com/

Did you know...

2008-09-12T09:02:00.000-07:00

That California's flag design was created by a mistake?

The orignial plan was to have a pear on the flag to represent the agricultural regions of the state, but through a misinterpretation a bear was painted instead.

source: http://www.snopes.com/lost/bearflag.asp

Winning Wednesday: Fantastic Contraption

2008-09-10T15:26:00.000-07:00

Things had been a little slow at work the past couple of weeks and in between having things to do, I was getting a little bored. By sheer coincidence fourzerotwo sent a tweet about a flash game he'd been checking out. I decided to give it a try.

It's called Fantastic Contraption and is a physics based puzzle game. Don't be frightened by the word physics, the only physics involved is the force of gravity. The gist of the game is that you have only five "materials" to build a machine within a certain space, and your machine must move a red object into a the red area of the screen. The trial version has 20 puzzles to try and you can save and link to them if you really like your creation and want to show it off. Another cool feature is that once you've solved the puzzle you can view other people's solutions (they can be pretty crazy). Here is one of my solutions. Give it a try: http://www.fantasticcontraption.com. If you come up with something you want to share post the link in the comment section.

How did a white dude get this deal?

2008-09-10T09:15:00.000-07:00

A few weekends back my wife, a few friends, and I all went out for happy hour and a light dinner. After eating, drinking, and chatting, we received our bill. On the receipt was the usual summery of why we had ordered in the typical truncated fashion, common on almost every computer generated receipt. I gave the bill a cursory glance and my eyes locked on to one particular item. How did I get this? I am neither black, nor a female. It looks like a good deal though, so I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. XD

What funny receipts have you come across?

(By the way it was for the Blackened Chicken Special)

Tech Tuesday: The new Zune Lineup/Firmware update!!!

2008-09-08T14:01:00.001-07:00

I've gone through a few PMP/MP3 players (this is my 5th), and the Zune has been my favorite so far. Let me preface this post by saying I do not have nor have I ever owned an iPod or iPhone, but I did do a pretty objective comparision after my third Creative Zen product crapped out and I decided to go with another company. (Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice shame on me; fool me three times, WTF was I thinking!?!?!?)

The Zune is Microsoft's answer to Apple's iPod and has been out for about 2 years now. Since they have been out they have made huge strides in the functionality of the device. The nice thing is that instead of leaving early adopters of the player out in the cold, all then new functionality is added to the older devices through a firmware (basically the operating system for a hardware device) update.

Out of the box, all of the Zune devices offer music, video, and picture support. But they also include FM radio and something called the "Zune Social".

The Social is my favorite part of the Zune community, as it allows you to view your friends listening habits and discover new music. Each Zune owner gets a "Zune Card" (see mine), this card automatically updates as you use the Zune software or sync your device. Your Xbox friends also are automatically added to your Zune social page (and visa versa).

Also Zune's have a feature called Zune-to-Zune sharing which allows you to "squirt" a song from your device to someone else's. If there is a song you really like, send it to your friend.

The current firmware version (v 2.5) also added some really nice features:

Wireless sync - if you computer is on, you can sync your music, videos, etc. without having to actually plug the device in
Friend sync - gives the ability to add your friend's Zune Card into your device and when you sync your device it will automatically update their card and download the songs they listened to last
Game support - added support to install games created on the XNA 3.0 framework

Finally on September 16th version 3.0 will be released (as well as a 16GB flash Zune and 120 GB hard drive Zune). The new features expected to be added with this update are:

Buy from FM - allows you to "tag" songs that you hear on the device's FM radio and when you sync or reach a hot spot, the device will download it
Wifi marketplace - now when connected to your home's wireless network or a hot spot you can browse the Zune Marketplace and download songs directly from the device
Games - game support is available now, but with the new update it won't have to be "unlocked". Two free games will also be added Hexic and Texas Hold'em.
Any friends' Zune cards you have added to your device will now automatically update whenever you connect to a hot spot (instead of having to manually sync them).
Audiobook support - adds support to Audible and Overdrive powered audio books.

Needless to say, I'm pretty excited!

sources:
http://gizmodo.com/5046872/official-new-zune-lineup-packs-more-storage-wi+fi-downloads

http://www.zune.net/en-US/products/

I can't believe youngsters these days!

2008-09-08T10:10:00.001-07:00

This past weekend I had one of the moments where you first think "Are you serious?" and then it is quickly followed by "Oh no...I'm getting older". The aforementioned moment occurred while I was waiting in checkout line at Target. I was daydreaming a bit (for some reason the lines were particularly long), when I snapped out of it I overheard a conversation going on behind me. I wasn't trying to eavesdrop, but what I heard blew my mind. It was a woman in her mid to late 20s and a girl who was probably in high school discussing a concert the girl's friends were talking about. She mentioned that her friends were going to a Metallica concert, and that's all they were talking about. I wasn't impressed as I've never really been a big Metallica fan, but then she uttered the words... "Who is Metallica anyway?"
...
Are you serious?
Like I said, I was never a huge fan, but I know who they are, I could sing you a few songs (hell, I can even play a few on Guitar Hero. It was then that things got worse. The woman's explanation was this: "They're a hard rock band, they were big back in the ninties"
...
Oh no... I'm getting older.
Not only are one of the most popular (and overexposed) hard rock bands of all time now a relic of the past, now the entire decade I was so familiar with (including my high school years) is being referenced as "the ninties" in the same tone that we used to refer to "the eighties".

Side note: before the response I thought to myself, "geez! even my mom knows who Metallica is!". In retrospect this did not help my case. :(

I killed a mountain!!!!

2008-09-07T23:30:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite games is Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare, its a first person shooter based in modern times with modern day weapons. Back in August I even got to go to the game developer's studio (Infinity Ward) and had a chance to meet their Community Relations Manager (Robert Bowling AKA: fourzerotwo)
When we have friends over we often will play a few rounds of multiplayer. One of my friends doesn't have an Xbox 360 and usually gets owned pretty badly when we play (he's getting better as he gets more time on it) and as we razz him about it he usually barks back that he's "actually fired these weapons!" (He's an MP in the Air Force).
This past Saturday I got a call from this buddy, asking me what I was doing on Sunday. I thought he was going to invite me to golf and hadn't played in a while, so I told him I wasn't doing anything in particular and would be down for whatever. He then proceeds to invite me to fire off some automatic weapons and riffle mounted grenades... wait... did you just say riffle mounted grenades!?!?!? Um... Hell Yeah I'm down! So we get to the range and I'm told I'll get to fire two types of light machine guns (LMGs) the M249 SAW and M240 as well as an M203 grenade launcher mounted on an M16. Good times. All in all I squeezed off 200 rounds on the M249, 400 rounds on the M240 and 5 M203 rounds.

There's more pics and video here.

In the wee small hours.

2008-09-06T10:12:00.001-07:00

Its mid-morning and already I've experienced the full gamut of human emotions. This morning I awoke to the sound of fighter jets flying by (there is a USAF air defense base in Fresno).
Annoyance: I am not generally a fan of being awaken by loud noises. I turned my head, still drowsy, and see this:

Panic: I start work at 8:00 (even though I am usually late, this is bad.)
Embarrassment: I realize its Saturday and I only work on weekdays.
Panic again: Why isn't my son up yet?!?! He's usually up between 7:30 and 8:30. I turn to where my wife sleeps... She's gone.
Relief: my son is fine and downstairs with my wife.
Guilt: I realize she's probably been taking care of the baby instead of sleeping for at least an hour and a half.
Fear: Worried about how I'll have to make this up to her.
Joy: When I see them smile at me when I creep downstairs.
Hunger: Going to take care of this now...