Low Tech Tuesday: Amish Paradise

I got a call today from my wife alerting me that she "broke our house". What she meant by this was that the power had shut off again (not really her fault) but this time it wouldn't come back on. We'd been having some trouble with one of the circuits in our home for the last few weeks, flickering lights, breaker constantly popping, etc. Normally the quick fix for this is to go to the breaker and switch all of the 15 amp breaker switches off and then. We end up having to do all of the plug breaker switches because the wiring in our house is RI-DIC-ULOUS, as it seems the builder/contractor decided to play a game called "confuse the electrician". I know it confuses electricians because my grandpa came over (a Master electrician) and he we looked for the problem for about four hours and the prognosis came up "inconclusive". So at this point we have no Kitchen lights (the stove, refrigerator, and other appliances including the coffee maker, still work) and several plugs are out (one in our playroom, two in our dining area, and four in our bedroom).

The real gem was getting to explore my attic space again. Notice I say attic space and not attic, there is a big difference. An attic is a place that usually has a floor and you are able to stand up and store stuff in. Our attic space is basically what I imagine hell to be like. In the very center of the space there is about four feet of clearance (I am 6'1" tall), and the clearance decreases with the slope of the roof. Boy! That sounds like it sucks... yeah well it gets better, the ceiling/backside of the roof has staples sticking about and inch and a half out everywhere just waiting for you to impale yourself when you forget there is a low ceiling. The "floor" is really just the drywall for the actual ceiling below you (which cannot support the weight of an adult male). There are piles and piles of fiberglass (what itching powder is made of) insulation with 20+ years of dust caked on. The wiring up there is pulled so tight that I was scared I'd pull something out while wiggling around, and to take up even more space there are heating ducts everywhere. Oh and spiderwebs... lots of spiderwebs.

So to recap, I was squirming around with spiders and itchy fiberglass up to my neck, gasping for breath between huge clouds of possibly toxic dust, all the while simultaneously trying not to stab my head or fall through the floor below as I shimmy and shake over ducts, pipes, and wires. Good times. I felt like Indiana Jones and was basically waiting for this guy to pop up underneath a pad of insulation:

And the best part. Round 2 tomorrow.